Scandal
by JaninaM8
Summary: The rewritten version. Loki has returned home from traveling abroad and finds his stepsister Jane all grown up and ready for marriage. He is not pleased by this. Jane is not pleased that he treats her as though she is still a child. What happens when feelings develop and take them both by surprise?
1. Chapter 1

I originally deleted this story (and Madness), and decided that since I wasn't happy with it from about chapter 3 on, I decided to rewrite it to my liking. I've been posting on my Tumblr fanfic blog, but a little birdie (Imogen74) encouraged me to post Scandal here again. I have been posting rewrites of Madness on Tumblr as well and so far I have no plans to post it here again.

**Chapter One**

**London, England 1820**

Jane Foster came running down the stairs of the townhouse she shared with her adopted family, Thor and Frigga Odinson. She was excited today because her other brother, Loki, was coming home after a year long trip to America. She had feared when they'd last seen him at their father's funeral and he announced that he was leaving for America that he would decide to stay there.

At the time emotions had been high as Odin had just passed and Loki had returned for the funeral only, and then was on his way. He and Odin had never seen eye-to-eye, had never gotten along very well compared to how well Thor and Odin had, and she knew that Loki preferred to stay gone and away from the family. He and Thor hadn't exactly got on well at the time either, and though Jane was kept in the dark about most of it, she knew it had something to do with their father and how he treated his sons.

Yet she was excited to see him, very much so. Loki had always been her favorite brother. Though she was not blood-related to any of the Odinsons, she had been welcomed into the family at the tender age of ten after her parents had perished in a carriage accident. Odin had taken her in, as Jane's father had been Odin's good friend for a very long time and there was no family of Jane's that had stepped forward to claim her. Loki had been thirteen, and Thor had been fourteen. They were told to treat Jane as a sister and they had. Sometimes too well. She well remembered the snake in her bed one night placed there by both brothers, and the games of hide-and-seek when they would "forget" to find her.

But she also remembered how Loki had taught her to play chess and Thor had taught her to climb trees – much to the distress of Frigga and Odin. Frigga, because she was worried Jane would break her neck and Odin because it wasn't proper.

Loki had also taught her to ride a horse and how to sneak food to the dog under the table if she didn't want to eat something in particular. He had taught her to swim and how to blame Thor for something she wasn't supposed to have done.

When Loki and his father kept butting heads – Frigga called Loki "willful" – Odin had sent Loki to Eton while hiring the best tutors in the area for Thor. Jane still remembered the look of utter betrayal on Loki's face when he'd left for Eton on a chilly Monday morning while they'd been sitting down by the fire in the parlor. Jane's heart had broken for him.

Like the good sister she had committed herself to be, Jane had written to Loki constantly. He didn't write back often and Jane wondered if it was too hard for him. Or if perhaps he just wanted to put everyone at Odinson manor behind him. Including her. The thought had stung for she had always been in Loki's corner. Always. He'd come home for Christmas, but spend his summers elsewhere. Then, when he'd graduated he'd gone to take his grand tour, and when he came back things had been just as before between him and Odin.

Jane had barely gotten Loki back before he had left again. Then he'd come back for the funeral and left again. Jane was determined that this time she would soak up as much time with her brother as she could before he left them all again.

"Jane, you'll break your neck running down the stairs like that," Thor said from the head of the dining room table.

Jane rolled her eyes and sat down to the left of him while Frigga sat to the right of him at the table.

"Your brother is right, Jane," Frigga said as she sipped her tea. "Please be careful."

Jane ignored them both as she buttered toast that had been left on her plate. "When is Loki arriving?" she asked.

"Any time now," Thor replied.

Jane squirmed excitedly in her seat.

"Jane, you must show a little decorum, please," Frigga said with a sigh.

Jane frowned. "Why? It's only us."

"It is good practice," Frigga said.

Jane sighed and took a dainty bite of her toast and sat up straight in her seat, the model of decorum and poise.

The sound of horses pounding their hooves on the ground sounded loud from the open windows behind them and Jane tossed her toast on the plate and jumped up. She ignored Frigga and Thor calling after her and ran to the doors and pushed them open before the butler could. She ran down the stairs just as Loki was stepping down from the carriage he'd been in.

"Loki!" she exclaimed and practically jumped in his arms. He caught her, laughing, and hugged her tightly. He smelled like bergamot and mint and Loki, her darling brother Loki. He was solid, too, and so tall. She had forgotten how tall he was.

"Jane," he murmured, and she felt one hand at the back of her neck, holding her against him while the other twined around her waist. "How's my girl?"

Jane shut her eyes and buried her face in his stiff black coat. "I missed you."

"I missed you as well," he said, his voice a deep rumble.

She stepped back and looked up at him, drinking him in. "You look taller," she told him. She smiled and reached up to touch his unruly black hair that was down to his shoulders. "Your hair has gotten longer, too." Her eyes met his and the warmth she saw there made her heart feel full. She looked away from his penetrating gaze and looked over the rest of him. He looked so dignified and proper with just a little bit of wildness about him.

"Jane, you have grown into such a beautiful young woman," he said. "How old are you now?"

"Nineteen. Not quite on the shelf yet, but I think mother is worried I will be. She is determined to make me a match this Season."

Loki pursed his thin lips together and furrowed his brows. "Well, we'll just have to see about that won't we? I'm back now and I won't let just anyone marry my sister."

"Now you sound like Thor," Jane said with a roll of her eyes.

"Brother."

Loki looked past Jane and his smile faltered as he watched Thor and Frigga come down the stairs. Frigga, though a bit more contained than Jane, threw her arms around her youngest and held him tight. Loki hugged her back, his eyes shut and a peaceful yet sad expression on his face.

"My son. You've come home," Frigga said, and it sounded as though she was about to cry.

"I am," Loki said softly. "How are you, Mother?"

Frigga pulled back and took Loki's face in between her hands and smiled at him as tears fell from her eyes. "I am so glad you've come home. You are back where you belong."

Loki didn't say a word, but just nodded once and pulled her hands from his face.

"Brother," Thor said again and came forward. Thor held out his hand and when Loki took it, Thor then embraced him. "Welcome home."

"Well, if you do not mind, I'd like to go up to my room or wherever it is you've put me and freshen up," Loki said when Thor stood back.

"Of course you still have your room, silly!" Jane said and took hold of his hand. "I'll take you up and you can tell me all about America."

Loki laughed. "You expect to hear all about America on one trip to the second floor?"

"Well, no, but you can at least tell me what it's like to sail on a ship."

He grimaced. "Not fun at all."

"Why?"

"Jane, darling, why don't you give Loki some breathing room?" Frigga said.

"It's all right, Mother," Loki said and grinned down at Jane. "I don't mind Jane badgering me."

Jane playfully swatted him on the arm and then slung her arm through his as they made their way up the stairs. "Did you have your own room at least?"

Frigga and Thor watched the pair walk up to the house and then disappear inside. They looked at each other. "Seems Jane will forget I exist now," Thor said with a wistful smile.

Frigga shook her head and laughed softly. "Never. Jane loves you both so very much."

Thor shrugged. "It's fine. Loki has always been her favorite, I know it. And I'm fine with it."

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Jane stood awkwardly outside Loki's bedchamber with her hands folded demurely in front of her as he went inside. For some reason she felt odd about following him inside. Though she had been in his bedchamber plenty of times before when they were growing up, now that they were older and Loki had been away so much it didn't feel right. It felt rather like an invasion. Or like a place that was not proper for her to enter.

She stood to the side as the servants brought his luggage inside and after a minute he came out and looked at her. "Jane? What are you doing standing out here?"

"Well, I don't want to intrude in your personal space…" she said with a frown.

He took her hands and pulled her inside with him. "You've been in my bedchamber before. Sometimes without me in it."

She shrugged. Apparently Loki didn't find it odd to have her in there so why should she find it so?

"Tell me," he said as he watched the servants leave for the next batch of luggage. "Are they any suitors I need to know about?"

"No, not really…" she bit her lip.

"What does 'not really' mean?"

"I don't have a suitor, but I do have a friend that is a man."

"Who?"

Jane's eyes narrowed slightly. "I'm not sure I should tell you."

Loki laughed. "What do you think I'll do?"

"I'm not sure yet."

"I'm home now, poppet, and I need to be brought up to speed as to what is happening in your life so I can acclimate myself to this life again."

"'This life'?"

"You know, life in the family."

Jane bit her lip. "You have always been part of the family, Loki."

Sadness flitted across his features and then he smiled at her. "Maybe so, but I have been gone for a very long time, Jane. As much as you want to know about me, I want to know about you as well."

"You might've known all along had you not left for America for a year."

Loki arched a brow and Jane looked down. "I apologize," she said. "I suppose I am still hurt that you'd gone so far away from me…from us."

Loki came over to her and cupped the side of her face with one hand. "I'm home now, Jane."

"For how long?"

"For good."

"Do you promise?"

Loki leaned in and kissed her cheek. "I promise," he whispered.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

In between directing the servants as to where he wanted his belongings placed and taking on the task of putting some items away himself, Loki told Jane about his time on the ship to and from America just as she'd wanted. He had just started to tell her about the illness that had ravaged the ship on the way back and the measures he'd gone to, to ensure he did not get sick when Frigga rapped on his door and then entered. "Jane, darling, it's time for your dance lesson," she announced.

Jane rolled her eyes and sighed. "Now?"

"Yes, now. Mr. Peters is waiting in the ballroom."

Jane grumbled, got up, and trudged out of the room. When she'd left the room, he looked at his mother. "Dance lessons?"

"They're refreshers, really," Frigga explained. "I want her to be ready for tonight."

Loki frowned. "Tonight?"

"There is a ball tonight and we've been invited. I've made arrangements for Jane to attend with her friend, Lady Darcy, so that Thor and I can be home with you—"

"No, I actually think I'd like to attend this ball," Loki said thoughtfully as he watched one of the servants place books in the bookcase in his room from one of the rather large trunks he'd had with him.

"You would?" Frigga seemed surprised.

"Jane tells me that you are determined to make her a match."

"Of course. You knew when she came of age that marriage was the plan for Jane."

"Yes, well, seeing as I do not necessarily trust Thor's judgment when it comes to our Jane, I want to make sure my sister makes the right match. I want to see what young dandies she has to choose from. She tells me she has a male 'friend' already?"

"Yes, Lord Steve Rogers. He's the third son of an earl and quite a polite young man. Jane insists they are just friends, but I think he may have more in mind for her. I would not be opposed to the match should he ask for her hand."

Loki frowned. "You would pursue the match for her even if she does not want anything more from him?"

"Loki, when did you become so…sentimental? Jane likes him well enough. She could grow to love him in time."

"I rather think Jane is the sort to want to marry for love first, not with the promise of it happening after. What about Thor? Should he not make himself a match first to carry on the Asgard title?"

"I daresay Thor is as stubborn as you are. He doesn't like to do things just because they are expected of him."

"Nor does Jane if I remember her character well."

"This sudden concern for your sister being in Society is heart-warming, but you're a little late. She made her debut while you were traveling, Loki."

"Well, I'm here now, mother, and I want only the best for Jane. I've seen the matches people in Society can make and I do not want something loveless for her. Jane has great passion and she needs a man that can match that. Nothing less will suffice for her."

Frigga sighed. "You and Jane have always had a special bond. I know you want the best for her, but could you perhaps trust me and Thor to make sure Jane is well taken care of?"

"No," Loki said bluntly. "I'm here now and _I_ will make sure."

Frigga shook her head. "I knew it would take only seconds for you and Jane to be as thick as thieves once more."

Loki grinned. "Of course."

"Do you need help unpacking, my son?"

"No, as a matter of fact, I think I will join Jane and brush up on my dancing as well."

With that, Loki was off and Frigga could only smile. Things were going back to normal quicker than she'd imagined it seemed.

Loki always found immense pleasure in making Jane laugh and he found he had been absolutely starved for the sound of it when she started giggling at all his missteps. It appeared Jane took great pleasure in Loki being utterly terrible at dancing.

I'm rusty," he told her. "Just rusty."

"Oh yes," she said and he could tell that she thought no, he was simply just terrible. "Did you not have occasion to dance in America?"

"I did…though I admit to preferring not to."

"I think you need this lesson more than I do."

Loki grinned down at her. "It appears that I do." And then he accidentally stepped on her foot and Jane shot him a mock glare.

It was about then that Mr. Peters took Loki aside and endeavored to teach him the steps rather than Jane. Jane followed along and it ended up that Mr. Peters and Jane refreshed Loki on his dancing.

When Mr. Peters left, Jane and Loki sat down in the chairs propped against the wall in the ballroom. Loki leaned his head back against the wall. "I hope I remember all that for tonight."

"Tonight?" Jane asked.

"I told Mother I wanted to attend the ball tonight."

"So you are all going now after all?" Jane asked excitedly.

"Yes."

"Oh, good!" Jane clapped her hands together happily and kissed his cheek.

Thor entered the ballroom them and smiled as he came up on his brother and sister. "I saw Mr. Peters leave," he explained. "He looked a little worn this afternoon. Jane, did you give him a hard time?"

Jane shook her head. "No, Loki did. He's horribly rusty, Thor."

Thor grinned. "Is he now?"

"Not to worry, brother, I will not embarrass you and shame the title this evening," Loki said.

"Mother did mention something about all of us attending the ball tonight after all."

"I figure the best way to acclimate myself to the ton is to thrust myself into it," Loki said. He then reached over and patted Jane's hand. "Plus, keep my eye on a certain young lady and her suitors."

"Jane, I'd like to speak with Loki alone for a bit…." Thor began.

Jane nodded and jumped up. She kissed Loki on the cheek followed by Thor and then made her way out of the ballroom, humming all the while. Loki watched her go, thinking he hadn't realized just how much he'd missed her until he was back in her presence. Jane had always had a way of making him smile and taking him out of his doldrums. He had a tendency to brood and Jane simply did not let him. She was the sun in his world, and it made him feel all the more protective of her.

He'd known in the back of his mind that Jane was of age to wed, but he'd ignored the fact, thinking that Jane would forever be the young girl that dogged his every step and hung on his every word. He didn't want to think of Jane as a wife to some unworthy Lord that didn't understand what he had in Jane. He certainly did not want to think of Jane doing all the things a wife did. Loki thought he might challenge any man who even had a fraction of the thoughts Loki had had about women he'd been attracted to.

"What can I do for you, Lord Asgard?" Loki asked with faux gallantry.

Thor frowned. "Pray, do not, brother."

"What? You are Lord Asgard now, are you not?"

"Shall I begin to call you Lord Loki Odinson then?"

Loki shrugged. "What may I do for you? Or, rather, since the apple does not fall far from the tree, what may I not do to ensure I do not embarrass the title?"

"Loki…don't. I am not Father and I will not treat you as Father did."

"So you admit that he treated me differently? That he found me lacking in every single way?"

"You both did your best to antagonize one another," Thor said diplomatically.

"I was simply myself."

"Yes, the more aggravating version of yourself."

"I do not plan to do anything unseemly, Thor. I am not home again to cause trouble."

"I know that."

"Do you?"

Thor shot him a look and Loki held up a hand. "I do have plans of my own."

Thor cocked his head to the side. "What sort of plans?"

"I made a friend in America, a fellow by the name of Anthony Stark. He was a businessman that invested his money in several endeavors that ended up benefiting him well. I plan to do the same. He taught me everything he knew and I plan to apply that knowledge here. I plan to make my own way."

"What do you have in mind to invest in?" Thor asked.

"Trade, mostly. Perhaps some real estate, risky as it might be. London is flourishing and I'd be a fool not to take advantage of it."

"Has your inheritance run out?"

Loki shook his head. "No." He left it at that. Let Thor guess why Loki felt it so important to have something of his own. For so long he had been compared to his brother the heir while Loki had simply been "the spare". Thor had been primed from birth that one day he would be Lord Asgard. Loki had been as well, but on a lesser scale. He had always been found lacking, and his mischievous nature had always been a source of contention between him and Odin. Odin wasn't any fun at all and it seemed he wanted his sons to be the same way. That was just not in Loki's nature and so the two never quite got along. Their father, Loki realized, was an old man with old-fashioned ideas. Loki did not plan to follow in his fathers footsteps. Let Thor have at it instead.

"I am glad you are home, brother," Thor said and looked Loki in the eye as he said it. "I have missed you. We have all missed you."

Loki acknowledged the sentiment with a nod, and then he stood. "If you'll excuse me. I must see about having my valet prepare me for this evening's ball. Who is hosting this ball anyway?"

"Lord Erik Selvig."

"Excellent. I always did like that man. Very smart." Loki stood, nodded to Thor, and left the ballroom.

Thor ran his hand through his errant strands of blond hair and sighed. It was going to take some time to build a relationship with Loki again, but Thor was determined to do it. He'd missed having a brother to cavort about with and hoped that in time they could get that camaraderie back.

"Jane! Do you wish to attend this ball or not?" Thor shouted from the foyer where he, Loki, and Frigga all waited for Jane to join them so they could leave.

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Jane called out and then came bounding down the stairs, ribbons in her hair flapping behind her.

Loki looked up at his sister and was about to tease her when instead he froze. Good God. His Jane has grown up. The soft turquoise dress she wore made her chocolate brown eyes pop and her brown hair seem somehow richer and more lustrous. And then there was the glaring fact that Jane now had a bosom! And it was provocatively being displayed by the low cut dress.

"Absolutely not," Loki said and pointed to the stairs. "Go back up and change."

Jane, having just reached the last step, gaped at him. Thor furrowed his brow and Frigga just looked bewildered.

"Pardon?" Jane said and looked to Frigga.

"You are not wearing that dress. It reveals too much," Loki said. "Find another."

Frigga laughed, the light peal of laughter that spoke of how silly she found Loki's complaint. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with that dress. It is the fashion now, Loki. We purchased that dress from the best modiste in London. Jane is fine. Come, darling, let's put on your cloak."

Jane came forward and Thor helped Jane with her cloak while Loki looked on, fuming. "Are you telling me that my sister has been wearing dresses just like that since her coming out?"

"Yes," Thor, Frigga, and Jane said in unison. The butler opened the door and Thor led the way out. Jane and Frigga followed behind him with Loki bringing up the rear.

"I'm going to have to beat them all off with a stick!" Loki exclaimed. "Don't you dare tip forward in any way, Jane, do you understand me? All those bloody wankers at the ball do not need to see any more than they already will be seeing!"

"You sound like Father now," Jane said with a roll of her eyes once they were all situated in the carriage.

Thor rapped on the roof to signal the driver they were ready.

"And I'll be bloody well acting like him, too," Loki warned her.

"Mother…" Jane said worriedly and looked at Frigga. Frigga opened her mouth to speak and Loki shook his head and cut her off. "No, don't go to Mother for help, Jane. I'm home now and you're just going to have to get used to it."

"Do not worry, dearest," Frigga said and patted Jane's hands. "Your brother is all bluster now, but when he's part of the crush and all the young ladies are fawning all over him, he'll forget he planned to play the part of watchdog tonight."

"We'll see about that," Loki grumbled.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Jane went to find her friend, Lady Darcy, as young women were wont to do at a ball. Loki had to stop himself from following after her to make sure some young buck didn't get any ideas about her. He stood with his mother and brother with a frown marring his face as he tracked Jane across the room. He was no stranger to being protective of Jane, yet this was something new.

When they were younger it was protecting her from falling out of a tree or drowning in the pond near their estate in the country. This was something else entirely. This was a need to hide her from the eyes of men he knew would be looking at his Jane with lust in their eyes. He felt ready to challenge every man who dared approach her with touching her on his mind to a duel.

This was about protecting Jane from men like him.

"Stop scowling," Frigga said as she waved her fan before her face. "You've just returned to Society and this is how you act?"

"If I'd known that Jane was attending balls in gowns like that I would have come home a lot sooner," Loki told her.

"Loki, look around you. She is not wearing anything scandalous. You are only seeing her gown as scandalous because you're being overprotective."

"I'd rather be overprotective than underprotective," he hissed.

"Do calm down, Loki. Jane is a lady and will not do anything to ruin her name—"

"It's not Jane doing anything to ruin her reputation that I am worried about. It's the men who look at her like they want to gobble her up that I am concerned about. Most of these wankers are not fit to breathe the same air as her." He started forward as he spied a young man with light brown hair approaching Jane. "Who is that she's talking to?"

"That is Lord Steve Rogers," Thor said. "He's harmless."

"Like hell," Loki muttered and started in the direction of Jane when he was stopped by a woman placing herself directly in his path.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Lord Loki Odinson back from the savage America."

Loki temporarily lost all train of thought at the amount of bosom nearly spilling out of Lady Sigyn's bodice. "Hello, Lady Sigyn," he drawled as he took her gloved hand and kissed her knuckles. "How do you fare?"

She smiled seductively. "I fare well. Even better now that you've returned. What do you say we get some air and catch up?"

Loki knew exactly what 'catching up' entailed and he would have to be daft to not want to take Lady Sigyn up on her offer. The two of them had dallied before and Loki knew he would depart from her thoroughly sated. Quite frankly, he rather needed it. Coming home had never been fun for Loki, and though he no longer had to deal with his father's judgments and backhanded comments, it was still jarring to return to the family fold that he'd distanced himself from for so long. He loved his mother but the same closeness was gone. He felt the strain with Thor…the only part to coming home that had felt right was Jane.

Jane…

He had been on a mission before Lady Sigyn had literally stepped in his path. He felt at a loss as to what he should do when Lady Sigyn took matters into her own hands and said, "Follow me."

How could Loki turn the lady down now?

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Loki fastened the button on his trousers and looked up at Lady Sigyn as she adjusted her dress and then patted her hair into place. His body felt sated, yet somehow he still felt restless.

"That was fun was it not?" Lady Sigyn asked with a smirk. "How was that for a welcome home?"

Loki smiled and nodded as he stood up from the water fountain where Lady Sigyn had ridden him to oblivion and he felt…dirty. Odd, that. He had never felt dirty after a tryst before, but now he did for some reason.

"How is my hair?" she asked.

"Perfect," Loki said. "You told me not to touch it and I didn't."

She smiled and patted the side of his face gently. "That's my Loki. Always so accommodating."

Loki's smile began to fall.

"I'll go back first," she said and started on the path back to the house.

Loki sat back down and heaved a sigh. What did it say about him that not even ten minutes into a ball and he was fucking Lady Sigyn in the gardens? He got up and started his trek back to the house. As he made his way up the stairs to the rather long balcony that led to the ballroom, he paused when he spied Jane talking to Lord Steve Rogers in a secluded corner.

When he saw Lord Steve whisper in her ear in a thoroughly intimate way, Loki saw red. With long strides he made his way toward Jane. She must have heard him coming for she turned to look his way and froze. And then her eyes narrowed.

"Jane, go back inside right now," he told her. He glared at Lord Steve who just looked back at him nonplussed.

"We're not doing anything wrong, Loki," Jane said.

"I do not care. You should not be out here alone with a man."

"I wonder if someone thought to warn Lady Sigyn about that?"

Loki's eyes went wide. Bloody hell. She knew about that?

"It's all right, Jane. I'll go inside first if you want to speak with your brother."

Jane lifted her chin and sniffed. "I do not. I'll go in first."

"And I will join you," Loki growled and took hold of her arm. He all but dragged her with him into the ballroom and Jane tried her best to free herself.

"Let go of me," she hissed.

"Stop acting like a spoiled brat and listen to me."

"No," she said and managed to pull herself free. "You worry about me and what I'm doing with suitors while you're off having a tryst with Lady Sigyn of all people. You've no room to tell me how to conduct myself, Loki. Steve—"

"Oh, we're on a first name basis with him now, are we?"

"Yes! He is my friend."

"I daresay he is more than a friend from what I saw."

"He's a gentleman and I like him."

"Has he kissed you?" Loki demanded.

The flush on Jane's cheeks told him all he needed to know on that front. Loki wanted to punch Lord Steve Rogers dead in his handsome face. It bothered him, the idea of Jane having been kissed. Young ladies were not supposed to kiss anyone before they were engaged. He knew women did it, but not his Jane. Not his pure of heart and innocent sister.

"That's going to stop right now," Loki said severely. "No sister of mine is going to be kissing men in darkened corners before she's engaged."

"You've done more than just kiss women in corners, Loki. I do not think you have any right to tell me what I can and cannot do after your tryst in the gardens with Lady Sigyn." She snapped her fan open and waved it in front of her face. "If you will now excuse me," she said and marched off, getting lost in the crush immediately.

"I need a bloody drink," he muttered to himself and went in search of one. He hadn't even been home a full day and already he was feeling murderous.

He grabbed a glass of wine off the refreshment table and looked upon the crowd. Lady Sigyn was dancing and overtly flirting with another gentleman, and Jane and Lord Steve were in the same dance, laughing together.

Something twisted unpleasantly in Loki's gut. He'd felt out of place before and now he just felt utterly out to sea.

"It is you!"

Loki looked to the side to see his old friend Malekith coming towards him. He forced a smile as his friend approached and the two shook hands. Then, more gentlemen came forward and a few women as well. Before Loki knew it there was a crowd surrounding him, peppering him with questions about his trip to America and the other places he'd gone. His mind was taken off Jane temporarily though she was still in the back of his mind. It was just as his mother had prophesized.

Somehow he was then thrust into taking one of the women to the dance floor and after that, Loki was never left without someone coming up to him to welcome him back.

By the time they were ready to go Loki was exhausted both physically and mentally. Arguing with Jane and then being swarmed by people had taken everything out of him.

Thor, Jane, Frigga, and Loki silently made their way to their carriage. Once inside, Thor and Frigga engaged Loki in a discussion of whom he had reconnected with and Jane arched a brow at him and looked away from him, remaining silent the whole way home.

When they arrived home, Jane practically ran up the stairs to her bedchamber and all Loki did was stand there and watch her go.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

The following morning after breakfast Loki found Jane out in the garden reading on one of the benches. He knew she must have heard him approach, but she paid him no mind until he sat down right beside her.

"Hello, Loki," she said dryly as she turned a page in her book.

"Hello, Jane. Enjoying the beautiful day?"

She closed her book and turned to face him. "Let's get this over with. You wish to lecture me on what you thought was bad behavior and I believe you have no argument."

Loki gazed down at his little spitfire and had to squelch the smile that he felt coming on. He always knew that when Jane got older she was going to be a force to contend with. "And you believe I have no argument because of what I was doing with Lady Sigyn."

"Exactly. It's unfair that you get to do whatever you want because you're a man and I cannot because I am a woman. That is everything that is wrong with society today. You can do what you want but I can't."

"You better not have done what I was doing with Lady Sigyn and that has nothing to do with the fact that you're a woman," Loki warned her.

"I know, I know, because I'm your sister and I should be locked up in a tower," she said with a roll of her eyes and sat back against the bench. "I've heard it all before, and mostly from Thor since my come out."

"I want to know exactly what the nature of your relationship is with Lord Steve Rogers."

Jane sighed heavily as if this was a horrendous imposition. "Lord Steve is a friend. That's all. We were…practicing on each other."

Loki gritted his teeth. "And just how far did you go with the practicing?"

"Not as far as you went with Lady Sigyn."

"Jane…"

"We kissed a few times, that's all. He is interested in someone else and…so am I."

Loki's entire body tensed. "Who?"

"He's interested in—"

"I don't give a fig about him, Jane. You. Who are _you_ interested in?"

She turned to face him. "Do you promise not to tell Mother and Thor?"

"Christ, is it that bad?"

"No. It's Lord Erik Lehnsherr."

"Absolutely not!" Loki blurted out and shook his head emphatically. "He's a philanderer, notoriously bankrupt, and he cavorts with whores. No."

"You've been away for how long, Loki? How would you know all this?"

"I hear things. News travels fast, Jane. And I ran into him in Italy. He had a questionable rash."

She narrowed her eyes. "You're lying."

"I am not." He was.

Jane leaned in close to him and peered up into his face. She was so close Loki could feel her breath on his face and see the green specks in her eyes. She smelled like honeysuckle. He felt himself lean in towards her and she sat back abruptly, jarring him out of whatever spell he'd temporarily felt himself under. "I still think you're lying," she said.

"Has he paid you any special attention?"

Jane frowned and kicked at the ground. "Not really, no."

"What do you mean by 'not really'?"

"He bumped into me and said 'I apologize, Lady Jane', and then continued on." She sighed dreamily and Loki rolled his eyes.

"And Thor and Mother do now know of your infatuation for him?"

"No. You promised you wouldn't tell, Loki," she said, sounding partly stern and partly nervous.

"I won't tell. But only if you cease kissing Lord Steve."

She shrugged. "Done."

"Jane, have you considered that Lord Steve may feel more for you than he is willing to admit? Does he know of your infatuation with Lord Erik?"

"Yes. He thinks the same as you about him."

Well then. That was quite telling wasn't it? "You are not that naïve, Jane."

She fell silent then and Loki knew for certain that she wasn't. She was quite aware of Lord Steve's feelings for her. "Jane—"

"It's not that I wish to hurt him, Loki," she explained. "I had a feeling he wasn't completely honest when he told me about his feelings for Lady Margaret Carter, but I thought when I told him about mine for Lord Erik it would discourage him."

"I would say kissing him probably encouraged him, Jane."

"I know and I feel awful. I just…this is going to sound terrible…"

"Just say it," Loki said and braced himself.

"I just really wanted the practice should I have occasion to kiss Lord Erik."

"You are absolutely right, Jane. That is terrible!" Loki admonished her. "You've been leading that boy on and you've been risking your reputation—"

"Don't even start, Loki. You are no innocent."

He turned to face her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Jane, look at me. I understand that you think what I did with Lady Sigyn was wrong and you're right in a way – it was. Lady Sigyn and I have a history—"

"I know all about your history with Lady Sigyn," Jane said bitterly.

"How do you know about that?" He didn't like the idea of Jane knowing about his tawdry affair with Lady Sigyn. It meant that Jane was old enough to know such things. Perhaps even engage in them.

"I hear things too. People talk, Loki."

"Yes, they do. That is why I do not want you to be kissing Lord Steve where people can see you – and before you even ask no, you are to cease kissing him altogether."

Jane made a face and looked away from him.

"Listen to me, sweetheart," he said gently and nudged her to look at him. She looked up at him, looking a bit contrite. "Lady Sigyn has a reputation, and not a very good one. I know I've not helped form it, but she's not my sister. You are. Your reputation is important to me. I do not want any sort of scandal to befall you, Jane. You would ruin yourself and your family with it. Do you want that?"

She sighed and shook her head. "No, I don't." Now she sounded downright melancholy.

"And that's why I also don't want you anywhere near Lord Erik. The man is a cad. Just exchanging a few polite words with him could land you into trouble."

"You two look serious," Thor said as he approached the pair. "What are we chatting about?"

Jane jumped up went over to Thor. "Thor, something needs to be done about Loki."

Thor chuckled. "Oh?"

"He's in danger of becoming a bit of a curmudgeon. I thought all the traveling would bring him back to us in better spirits. Instead he's a bit stiff and unyielding."

"Jane," Loki said warningly.

Seeming to understand that if she continued on this path of teasing Loki she would find herself in big trouble, Jane turned and flashed Loki a wide smile that made her look positive angelic. Loki fell for it for all of a second. He knew all about charming someone to your side – he did it all the time. No doubt the brat had learned it from him. She came over and kissed his cheek sweetly. "If you tell anyone about Lord Steve and Lord Erik I'll tell Mother about Lady Sigyn," Jane whispered in his ear and then, clutching her book before her demurely, she nodded and smiled to Thor as she passed by him and headed back to the house.

_That little minx_, Loki thought as he watched her go.

"So, what is it you've become such a curmudgeon about, brother?"

Loki shook his head and waved a hand dismissively. "Jane exaggerates. I was just doing my brotherly duty and giving her my speech about guarding her reputation. A little late, I know, and I'm sure you've done it already as has Mother, but I thought I would pitch in."

"She is a headstrong girl," Thor said with a sigh. "I swear she hears me, but pretends she does not."

Loki chuckled. "And here I thought she'd turn out to be sweet."

Thor smiled and nodded to him. "What say you join me for a drink at the club? I'll get you in, you'll become a member, and whenever you have a need to be around men after being around women all day…"

"We are outnumbered aren't we?" Loki surmised.

"Even the cat is a girl."

Loki chuckled and nodded. "Say, does Lord Erik Lehnsherr visit your club?"

Thor cocked his head to the side and looked at Loki curiously. "He does. Why?"

"Well, I ran into him in Italy and we shared a bit of conversation. I thought now that I'm back I'd say hello." _And make sure Jane isn't even a passing thought in his pea brain, _Loki thought_. _


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Brook's, the gentleman's club that Thor belonged to, boasted a fire place, the best ale and port in London, and a hearty meal. There were several tables, even a wall lined with books, and Loki found groups of gentleman playing whist and various other card games together. The atmosphere was relaxed and comfortable, almost homey.

As Thor spoke to the proprietor of the place about securing a membership for Loki, Loki scanned the crowd looking for Lord Erik. He found him playing whist and decided to wait and bide his time.

An hour later, Loki was seated with the daily newspaper on his lap and was sipping brandy. Thor was going on and on about Asgard Hall in Derbyshire, their home seat during the off season, and Loki was keeping an eye on Lord Erik whilst thinking about Jane.

His Jane who had grown into a beautiful young woman – and a bit of a brat and a hoyden, too. His still remembered the day Jane had come to the Odinson household and he and Thor had been told to treat her like a sister. It hadn't been that hard to do. They had all seen each other often enough. It was just hard for a while to bring Jane out of her grief. Thor and Loki, back when they'd gotten along, had had been made fools of themselves to make her laugh. Wherever they went, they took her with them. After a while it was as if they had always been family.

He'd known logically that one day she would be of age to marry. Why, now that it was time for that to happen was he having such a difficult time with it? Was it because he had been away for so long and while he'd grown up and changed, he'd hoped Jane had stayed that little girl that thought of Loki as her hero? He'd missed out on her most formidable years after all being gone first to school and then as far as he could get away from his father.. and now his dear sweet Jane was grown and beautiful and God, a _woman_.

He wanted to protect her. To lock her up in a tower where no man could sully her. He wanted her to be his little Jane forever, and she _was_ his. Plain and simple. She always had been, and she always would be.

He had to find a way to come to terms with the fact that Jane was of that age to marry, and that she had to marry, and would marry. The best he could do was make sure she married someone she wanted, and not someone she felt only lukewarm about.

Loki's gut clenched at the very thought of it though and he wondered why the hell this was bothering him so damn much.

"The Temples work hard and produce much. They don't ask for much, never have. I fixed a roof for them before winter – before the first snow fall actually – and it was good work. I know I'm not supposed to do such thing, being an earl and all, but I don't really see what the trouble is in getting your hands dirty once in a while. It's good for me. It keeps me humble and…"

Loki tuned out Thor again as he thought of the letters she'd sent him over the years and how little he'd written her. He felt guilty about that now. At the time he'd had to distance himself from the family but he had always missed his Jane. He would voraciously read her letters when he'd gotten them. Her narrative had always brought a smile to his face. At the end of every letter, she'd pepper him with questions about his adventures. Jane had always wanted to travel and had never gotten the opportunity to do so. If she married her husband could probably fulfill her wish and satisfy her adventurous spirit. She did always wish to learn about other cultures.

The thought of Jane going away when he'd just gotten back saddened him. Couldn't it just be them for a while? Just them being the Jane and Loki they'd been as kids?

He felt the urge to see her, to do something fun and childish as they'd done in the past. He looked at Thor and said, "Are we done here?"

Thor blinked. "Have you been listening to anything I've said?"

"Yes, of course. Roofs, shingles, tilling the Earth, and all the good feelings hard work instills in a man. I get it. Makes one feel…robust. Are we finished?"

"I—I suppose—"

"Good, good, I'll wait in the hansom."

The ride back to the town house was silent, and Loki thanked the Gods for small favors. He didn't want to pretend to listen anymore.

As soon as they arrived home, Loki flew from the hansom and up the stairs to the house. "Jane!" he called out. "Jane!"

Frigga came bustling from the drawing room, frowning at Loki. "Good heavens, Loki. You're likely to shout down the roof."

"Not likely. Tell me, Mother, where is Jane?"

"She's gone for a stroll in Hyde Park with Lady Darcy Lewis. What is wrong, Loki? What do you need her for?"

"I just wanted to see her, perhaps do something reckless as we did when we were kids."

"Goodness, not that, please!"

"Perhaps I'll pop down to Hyde Park to see her," Loki said and as Thor came inside, Loki passed by him to go back and take the hansom to Hyde Park.

When he arrived at Hyde Park, he scanned the area. He had absolutely no idea how to find Jane in this vast space with the incredibly annoying large throng of people.

He began to walk further inside and then stopped when he spied two horse riders toward the back of the park. One female, one male. Long brown hair trailed behind the female. He knew that hair.

"I am going to wring her bloody neck," Loki growled as he marched forward. She was riding hell bent for leather and his heart stopped. She was going to kill herself!

Slightly out of breath, Loki strode quickly to stand beside Lady Darcy. "Lady Darcy."

Lady Darcy looked at him and her eyes widened. "Lord Loki!"

Loki nodded, still a bit out of breath. He gestured to Jane. "What the bloody hell is she doing?"

Lady Darcy bit her lip and looked away. "Oh, uh…well, that is…"

"Tell. Me. Now," Loki growled.

"Lord Steve challenged her to a race and you know how Jane is – I think you do anyway – she couldn't refuse."

The pounding of hooves sounding quite close to a thunderstorm sounded in Loki's ears and he looked up to find Jane racing past him. She spotted him and her mouth went into the shape of an 'O' and she looked at him as she fled past.

"Watch what you're doing!" he shouted after her. One wrong move and she'd be thrown from the horse and break her goddamned neck.

"Lord Loki?"

Loki looked down and found he was gripped Lady Darcy's forearm. He dropped it. "My apologies."

He watched Jane come to a stop with Lord Steve coming up behind her. Loki marched off in her direction. She saw him coming and though she appeared a bit nervous, she lifted her chin in defiance nonetheless.

"Jane," he said sweetly. "Pray get down from the horse."

Her eyes narrowed. "No, I don't think I shall do that, Loki."

"Sister dear, Mother sent me to fetch you. Please come down from there."

"Is everything all right?" Lord Steve asked as he dismounted his horse and came over to help her down.

Loki shot him a glare and Lord Steve stopped in his tracks. "Is this your horse?" Loki asked Jane.

"No, it's one of mine," Steve said. "From my hansom."

Loki held up a hand to Jane and she took it limply. He yanked hard and she came tumbling down into his arms. She gripped his biceps and looked up at him in surprise. He glared down at her.

"Lady Jane could have seriously been injured," Loki said as he helped Jane right herself. He took her hand. "Hyde Park is no place to race in the afternoon with such a crush. That being said however, I do not want my sister racing like that again no matter the venue. Do I make myself clear, Lord Steve?"

"Yes," Lord Steve said, looking guilty.

"I'm glad we understand each other, because if it happens again I will tear off your cock and shove it up your arse."

Lord Steve paled.

"I trust you can see Lady Darcy home safely?" Loki asked him.

"Of course."

Loki nodded once and pulled Jane with him.

"I cannot believe you just said that," Jane hissed at him.

"Oh, Jane. If you only knew the things I'd like to say in this moment and don't. And the things I'd like to do, namely take you over my knee."

"You wouldn't dare."

He stopped and she slammed into him. He moved until their faces were inches apart. "Do _not_ tempt me," he said harshly.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

"Don't you think perhaps you're being a little ridiculous?" Jane asked as she and Loki rode home together in the hansom.

"You could have broken your neck riding like that," Loki spat. "There were far too many people about and the horse could have gotten easily spooked. So, no, I don't think I am being the least bit ridiculous. Not to mention you were riding like that for all of London to see. They're going to think Lady Jane Foster is a hoyden."

She sighed and folded her arms across her chest. "You embarrassed me in front of my friends."

"Lord Steve should never have invited you to risk your neck."

Once they arrived home, Jane all but hurled herself out of the hansom. Loki followed hastily after her and grabbed her arm before she could go inside the house. She yanked her arm free and faced him. "I think I liked it better when you were gone," she hissed and then ran into the house and up the stairs.

Thor came out of the house, one brow arched. "Dare I ask why Jane just ran up to her bedroom as if Satan himself was at her heels?"

Loki sighed and raked a hand through his hair, still reeling from her harsh words. "We had a little bit of a spat."

"About?"

"I'd rather not speak of it," Loki said. "If you'll excuse me…I think I would like a drink." He jogged back down to the hansom and directed the driver to take him to the nearest tavern.

It was late by the time Loki stumbled through the door. He knew that his mother, Jane, and Thor had to be fast asleep by now, and he was rather glad for it. He was still drunk though the effects were starting to wear off, and he smelled of smoke and liquor. His mother would no doubt be upset with him whilst rolling her eyes and muttering about men and what they considered fun. Thor would be put out that Loki hadn't invited him along and Jane…

Jane was probably just happy that Loki hadn't ratted her out and most likely preferred him gone. She had said as much hadn't she?

When he thought of her angrily spoken words he still felt the sting of them. Logically he knew that she had just been upset and had probably spoken in the moment. He kept telling himself that though the fact that he had to do that told him her words had hurt him.

What was happening to them? Or rather, what _had_ happened? Jane had always been his best friend and confidante. She used to follow him all over the place, used to seek out his company and hang on his every word. Now she couldn't get far enough away from him and he…well, he was acting like a madman. All because Jane had a suitor, an infatuation, and could well be on her way to walking down the aisle.

He shouldn't feel this...this…he didn't even know what to call it! But when he thought of Jane marrying, of kissing men in secluded corners, he went mad.

Loki made his way into the drawing room and beelined for the bar. He needed a drink to keep from getting too sober and maudlin. He stopped in his tracks when he spied Jane curled up in a chair near the fireplace, a blanket over her and her hair plaited. The fire was dying and one candle on the mantle was going to sputter itself out quite soon.

He stood rooted to the spot, and as though she could feel him watching her, her eyes opened and she jumped a little when she saw him. They stared at each other like that for a long while before Jane jumped up from the chair, the blanket falling to her feet, and ran over to him.

He caught her in his arms just as she leapt at him, throwing hers around him tightly. She was in her nightrail and a bathrobe. That was the first thought Loki had when she wound herself around him. "I'm sorry!" she exclaimed. "I do not wish you had stayed gone, Loki. I am glad you're home. Please don't leave us now after I've gone and said something so awful."

Loki awkwardly hugged her back, feeling somehow that this was improper. _She's your sister; you can hug your sister_, he thought. Still, something about hugging her in her night clothes made him feel like a lecher.

"It's all right, Jane," he said and pushed her gently away from him.

"No, it's not all right. I mean, I still think you acted like an overprotective oaf, but I've been worried since you left that you were planning to just leave for good this time." She wrung her hands together and tears filled her eyes. "I don't want you to leave again, Loki. I missed you so much while you were gone."

"I will not leave you," he told her softly, and meant it. If he left, Jane would certainly get married right quick and when he returned again she'd maybe have a passel of kids. The liquor churned in his belly and he felt sick. Despite feeling like a lecher, he drew her close. He never had been able to stand the sight of her tears. They undid him completely. This time he hugged her fully and she clung to him. He turned his head and could smell the lavender in her hair.

_This isn't right…_

"Mother was not pleased with me," Jane said. "I told her what happened. She wanted to know why you'd been gone so long and I couldn't keep it in any longer. She was worried."

Loki lifted his head and pressed the side of his face against the side of hers. "Did you bathe with lavender tonight?" he murmured.

"Yes," she said, sounding as if she thought he was crazy. He thought perhaps he was. He nuzzled the side of her face with his nose.

"Loki?"

"My Jane…you smell good."

"You don't. Stop, you're tickling me." She pushed at him and laughed nervously.

Loki looked at her, feeling as though someone had dropped him in the Thames. He'd crossed a line, hadn't acted like himself – definitely not like a brother. What the bloody hell was the wrong with him? Did he say something or pretend it didn't happen – that he hadn't just been nuzzling her and going on about how wonderful she smelled as though she was his lover.

"You're very drunk," she said.

"I am," he said softly.

"Did you fall into a vat of alcohol?"

"No." _But close. _

"Did you see Lady Sigyn?"

He'd thought about it, but "No."

She looked toward the door. "I should go to bed…so should you."

He grabbed her arm before she could escape. "Why…why does Lady Sigyn bother you so much?"

She looked alarmed by his grabbing her, but she answered him. "Because she's a terrible person and you deserve better than the likes of her."

"You've always been my biggest defender, Jane," he said softly. "You've always been the one to see the best in me when no one else could."

"You think I'm the only one that thinks you are a good person? You're wrong. Mother and Thor love you, Loki. Very much. I wish you'd see it."

He smiled at her. "You are still my champion, Jane. May I offer some advice?"

Her eyes narrowed and she frowned. "This should be good."

"You deserve much better than Lord Erik."

She said nothing, but the look on her face told him that soon she'd be taking back her apology. "Good night, Loki," she said and started to walk away.

"You are the most important person to me in the world, Jane. I have always loved you best and above all others. Please do not forget that," he said to her retreating back.

She stopped and looked at him. Studied him with furrowed brow.

And then she left.

Loki poured himself a drink, sank down in the settee and wondered what the bloody fucking hell was going on with him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

The following afternoon Jane sat in the Conservatory with a book that she had yet to look at in her hand. Darcy had come by for a visit and to ask if Jane could join her for a walk in Hyde Park, but after yesterday's debacle, Frigga had decided it was best that Jane stay at home without any visitors and "reflect on her behavior".

All Jane was reflecting on was the night before in the drawing room with Loki.

She'd…felt something. When he'd nuzzled the side of her face in that adorable way she'd felt as though the air around them had shifted. It had almost felt thick. What she'd wanted to do was tilt her head further to the side and encourage more of his attentions. It rather disturbed her. Then he'd gone and told her how he loved her best and above all others and she was certain her heart was going to beat right out of her chest.

She knew this was most definitely not sisterly affection she was feeling for these were the feelings she'd had when she'd first seen Lord Erik across a ballroom. How many nights had she fantasized about Lord Erik bestowing upon her all sorts of kisses and affection?

Jane shut her book and rubbed her forehead, resting an elbow on the settee she was sitting upon. Where were these feelings coming from? Loki was her brother. Well, not by blood, but in all the other ways that mattered he was. Was she sick? Was there something wrong with her? This wasn't something she could disclose to anyone, not even Darcy.

She got up, needing movement, needing to somehow exercise this out of her system. She made her way outside and breathed in the air. London air wasn't always that fresh, but this would have to do.

"Oh, uh, hello, Jane."

Jane's heart began to race at the sound of Loki's voice behind her. She turned and forced a smile. "Hello, brother."

He wasn't meeting her eyes. _He must remember last night. I didn't imagine it,_ she thought. So then, what did that mean? Then she noticed he looked ready to leave the house. "Where are you off to?" she asked, trying to keep her voice light.

"I thought I'd get an ice…" He frowned. "Would you like one?"

"Mother doesn't want me to go out today. You were not at breakfast this morning. Where were you?"

"I went to meet with the shipping company my friend Anthony Stark put me in touch with in America. I am planning to make some investments in their company."

Jane looked up at him with interest. "Oh?"

"You look surprised."

"I suppose I am. I did not think you would be…well, working."

"I dislike being nothing more than the spare to the Asgard title. I wish for more. I wish to make my own way. What do you think? I could find out about some pretty silks from India for a pretty ball gown for you?" She made a face and Loki arched a brow. "Do silks not interest you?"

"I'd like to think I'm not as shallow and predictable as all that."

He laughed softly. "Indeed you are not," he told her. "What then would interest you?"

"Well…Darcy's father took a trip to India and he came back with the most interesting looking scabbard. There were all these intricate marking on it and it was curved…why are you laughing again?"

"Because leave it to you to wish for a weapon over pretty material," he said. He reached up as if he was about to touch her, but then he dropped his hand and cleared his throat. "Why don't we go out for a bit?" he asked.

"But Mother—"

He smiled. "I would be shirking my duties as your favorite brother if I did not sneak you out of the house for a bit of fun."

"Then I will gladly accompany you," she said. He offered her his arm and Jane tried to notice the heat of his body and the strength she felt in his arms.

It was no big surprise that Gunter's was busy. Loki told her to wait for him in the hansom and he'd be back quickly with ices for the both of them. Jane sat back and watched the crowd at Hyde Park from the partially disclosed view of her seat. Her gaze drifted back to the entrance of Gunter's to see if she could see Loki and instead she found Lord Erik walking briskly away from the shoppe with an ice in his hand. Jane sat up straighter in her seat as she watched him and that's when she spied some folded bills falling from his jacket pocket.

Without thinking, Jane unlatched the hansom door and jumped out. She ran towards the money and picked it up off the ground and then ran after Lord Erik.

"Lord Erik!" she called out.

He stopped and turned and arched a brow at her.

Jane realized her error then. A young lady did not shout the name of anyone in public, but most of all she did not shout the name of a man she had not been formerly introduced to. A young lady also did not run in public – in fact, a young lady did not run at all. She heard her mother in her head saying how running was "common".

She felt a blush rise up fiercely, making her feel hot. She stopped running and walked up to Lord Erik with his money in hand. "These fell out of your pocket," she said, looking down at the money she thrust toward him instead of at him.

He took the money from her. "It's Lady Jane Odinson, is it not?" he asked. His voice was deep, yet not melodious as Loki's was.

"Yes, my Lord. I apologize for shouting after you. It was unseemly of me."

"Lady Jane, will you please look at me?"

Jane looked up at the man that had been the object of her affections since the start of the Season and found herself comparing him to Loki. It was utterly absurd and it disturbed her deeply to be doing such a thing. Lord Erik was an extremely handsome man and most importantly he was not her brother!

He smiled at her and Jane felt a part of her melt. Good. Perhaps her crush on Lord Erik was still intact. "Thank you, Lady Jane, for alerting me to my missing bills."

"You're welcome," she said.

"Will you be at Lord Xavier's ball this evening?"

"I will," Jane said with a nod.

"Then may I ask for a formal introduction?"

Jane felt her pulse speed up with excitement and anticipation. "Yes," she said and was surprised by the breathless quality to her voice.

He smiled and bowed. "Then I shall see you tonight, Lady Jane."

She nodded and smiled at him and watched him walk away, swallowed by the throng of people in Hyde Park.

"Jane? What are you doing out of the hansom? I thought you were going to wait for me."

Jane turned to find Loki looking at her with questioningly. He hadn't seen her speaking with Lord Erik. If he had he would have said something unfavorable. Good. She didn't want to tell him. If she did he might ruin her chance at a formal introduction tonight and she did not want that.

"I wished to stretch my legs," she told him and took the ice he held out to her. She smiled. "Thank you, Loki."

"We are all right then, Jane?" he asked.

"Right as rain, Loki."

"And I am still your favorite?"

He sounded more like himself now, which made Jane relax for the first time since they'd left the house. "Of course."

He grinned. "How about we find a bench to sit on and watch for any drama that might unfold."

She grinned and nodded and followed him to find a bench. Tonight she was finally going to meet Lord Erik. Perhaps he'd even ask her for a dance! Now she could put these odd feelings for Loki aside and concentrate on that instead.

**xxxxxxxx**

Jane half-expected Loki to be waiting at the bottom of the stairs and waiting to demand she go back up the stairs and change. He was at the bottom of the stairs, but he wasn't paying her any attention. He barely even glanced at her. Perhaps things were not back to normal as she'd thought.

They'd had a lovely afternoon in Hyde Park watching people pass by and making comments here and there about them. Things had felt like they did before. And now she felt this gulf between them that she didn't know how to bridge. She didn't even exactly understand what was causing it except that she was aware of Loki as more than her brother. She was aware of him as a man.

And that was wrong.

_Think about Lord Erik, __she thought__. Think of your introduction and your possible dance with him. _She was a wee bit concerned though about how this was all going to happen. She feared Loki sending Lord Erik away when he came for the introduction, and she feared if he did ask for a dance Loki would tell her no. She bit her lip and wondered if there was some way she could make sure Loki was otherwise engaged when Lord Erik came over…

Perhaps she could convince him to dance with Darcy. Or tell her mother to encourage Loki to dance with some young maiden. _Oh, Goodness, what if Lady Sigyn in there? _Jane wondered and felt her stomach drop to her feet. _Don't think of it,_ she scolded herself. _What Loki does is his own business, not yours. Focus on Lord Erik. _

"You're quiet this evening, Jane. You all right?" Thor asked once they were in the carriage on their way to Lord Xavier's ball.

"I am," Jane said, a little too quickly and then smiled. "I was just thinking about all the dancing I want to do tonight and I thought how nice it would be if my big brothers asked Darcy to dance."

"Were you now?" Loki murmured, watching her closely.

Jane nodded. "I think she intimidates some of the men. If she was seen dancing with the both of you I think it would help her fill her dance card tremendously."

"Done," Thor said and nodded.

Jane cocked her head to the side and looked at Loki expectantly. He drew in a sigh and nodded. "I will ask her for a dance, Jane."

She smiled broadly. Perfect. Now to put it all together…

xxxxxxxxx

"I don't mind dancing with your brothers, Jane," Darcy told Jane after Jane had brought her up to speed about Lord Erik and diverting Loki from thwarting him from gaining an introduction and a dance. "But how will we know when Lord Erik is going to ask for an introduction?"

Jane bit her lip. "We'll just have to watch him."

Darcy looked concerned. "I don't know, Jane. This might not work."

"It will, Darcy. Just have a little faith."

"But what if he asks for an introduction in the middle of a dance? How can I then divert Loki by having him dance with me?"

"Pretend you hurt yourself, stepped on something – anything, Darcy, please!"

Darcy sighed. "Do you really think he'd snub Lord Erik in front of everyone at a ball?"

Jane shrugged and looked at her helplessly. "I don't know, but I can't take that chance. Loki has never cared for propriety. He does what he wants."

After dances with Loki, Lord Steve, and then Thor, Jane was growing impatient for Lord Erik to approach her. She had been watching him all night and noted he had yet to dance. She began to wonder if he would even ask her to do so, and then as time stretched on she wondered if he had forgotten about her entirely.

"Jane, are you sure you're feeling well?" Loki asked at one point.

She looked up at him. "Yes, why?"

"Because you've seemed distracted all night. During our dance you missed a few steps."

She shrugged. "Perhaps I am a little tired—" she broke off when she saw Lord Erik and Lord Xavier headed their way over Loki's shoulder. Drat. And it was in the middle of a dance.

"Jane?" Loki prompted, looking worried. He started to turn to look at what she was looking at when Darcy jumped up from her chair and popped up behind him, distracting him.

"I think we should get Jane something to drink, Lord Loki," Darcy said quickly. "She looks a little flushed from the crush don't you think?"

"Yes, I am feeling a bit parched and dizzy," Jane said, making sure she sounded appropriately listless. "Would you mind ever so, Loki?"

"Well—" he began, but then Darcy pushed him past Jane. He looked at Darcy sharply and she just smiled coquettishly. "Oh, dear me, I do apologize. I am just such a klutz sometimes. Perhaps I should lean on you a bit through this crush though," she said and slid her arm through his.

Loki looked bewildered and annoyed, and with one last look at Jane, began navigating both he and Darcy to the refreshment table.

Jane sighed with relief just as she heard Lord Xavier speaking with her mother and Thor. She turned and smiled brightly, just as Thor called her over.

At. Last.

"Lady Jane," Lord Erik began after the formal introductions were made, "I was hoping to ask you for a dance."

Jane smiled. "Yes, Lord Erik, I would be happy to dance with you."

He grinned and as though the universe were lining up just right for this moment, the previous dance ended and the strains of a new one began. Lord Erik offered his arm to her and Jane took it happily. This was the moment she had been waiting for all Season.

She just wished she could relax and enjoy it without worrying about Loki and what he would think and do niggling in the back of her mind. Covertly she looked for him and Darcy and found them together at the refreshment table. She was prattling on about something and Loki just looked annoyed.

Then he turned and looked her way as if he knew she was looking at him.

He at first looked shocked to see her on the arm of Lord Erik. Then his eyes narrowed.

"Are you all right, Lady Jane?" Lord Erik asked her as they made their way to the dance floor where people were taking their places for a quadrille.

She flashed him a brilliant smile. "I am, Lord Erik, thank you."

He smiled at her and Jane put Loki out of her head and focused on not missing any steps and smiling at Lord Erik.

A few times as she turned in the direction of her family, she could see Loki out of the corner of her eye and feel his eyes upon her. When the dance was over Lord Erik kissed her hand as she curtseyed and then led her back to Frigga. He thanked her, winked, and was off. She felt someone seize her hand abruptly and yank slightly. Jane looked up to find an irate looking Loki.

"I wonder," he said evenly, "why I feel as though I have been toyed with."

Jane widened her eyes in what she hoped looked like pure innocence. "Whatever do you mean?"

His eyes narrowed and Jane worked on giving nothing away.

"You know perfectly well what I am saying, Jane. That whole show you and Lady Darcy put on – you were quite eager for me to be out of the way. Why?"

"You're being ridiculous," she said and shook her head. "You always did have an active – what are you doing? Where are you dragging me?"

Loki pulled her through the crush and Jane turned to Thor and Frigga for help only to find them engaged in conversation with Lord Xavier. Darcy was on the dance floor.

"You're going to make a scene," she hissed at Loki and tried to pull her hand free from his grasp.

He continued on ignoring her. They came out in the hall and Loki continued on down the hall and into the second room on the right. It was a library and Jane managed to sweep the room with her eyes once before Loki demanded her attention.

"You knew he was coming over to ask for an introduction and a dance, didn't you Jane?" he asked, his voice low and deadly.

Her temper flared and she lifted her chin and glared at him. "Yes. I met him in the park this afternoon while you were getting us an ice at Gunter's."

Loki looked ready to explode. "And how did that come to be?"

"He dropped some money on the ground and I…let him know."

"How?"

"I called after him. I…ran after him."

"You what?!" Loki exploded.

"He'd dropped his money, Loki; I had to let him know before someone else picked it up and made off with it!"

"You don't run after a gentleman in public – if Lord Erik can even be called a gentleman—"

"He is!" Jane said obstinately. She stomped her foot. "I'm not a child, Loki—"

She broke off when Loki's hand snapped out and curled around the back of her neck. He drew her close to him, looking into her eyes with his piercing green eyes. He vibrated with anger and…and something she couldn't put her finger on. He was breathing heavy and Jane thought – _He is going to kiss me_ – but then Loki released her and moved away from her as though she was on fire. Her heart thudded hard in her chest and she placed a hand on her chest.

"Do not play games with me again, Jane," he told her, his back to her. "I do not like being toyed with, especially from you."

"I would have told you had you been reasonable, but—"

He held up a hand, cutting her off. "You have disappointed me." He turned and looked at her. "You and I have always told each other everything—"

"Not everything," she retorted. "You never told me about Lady Sigyn."

"My affair with Lady Sigyn was not for a young maiden's ears."

"So I have to tell you everything while you get to pick and choose? That's not very fair is it?"

"Life is often not—"

"Please don't," she said with a sigh. "You made it clear how you felt about Lord Erik. I wanted an introduction with him regardless, and I was not about to let you scare him off. Yes, I planned to keep you away so that I could have that introduction and dance and…" She swallowed hard folded her hands tightly together before her, "I am not sorry for it. I understand that you're disappointed and upset with me for my actions, but I'm not the same Jane that you could order about when we were younger. I'm not a little girl anymore."

He moved so that he was standing directly in front of her with barely any space between them. "If there has been anything I am quite clear on, Jane, it's that you are not a little girl any longer," he said, and it sounded as though his voice cracked as he spoke. Then he turned and stalked off, leaving Jane with tears in her eyes. When she'd composed herself and returned to the ball she found out that Loki had gone home.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

"Jane."

Jane looked up from her book and smiled at Thor as he approached her in the garden. He sat down beside her on the bench and she closed her book and placed it on her lap. "Hello, brother," she greeted him. "Finally got your head out of the papers on your desk?"

"Too much work to do as an Earl," he grumbled.

"Is it too much?" Jane asked in concern. "Perhaps you should ask Loki for help."

"No, no, he's been busy himself with his own work with the shipping company."

Jane nodded. "And how is it going for him?"

"You'd know if you two were speaking."

Jane looked side long at Thor and found him looking at her with a bit of a grin on his face. She pursed her lips together and faced straight ahead once more.

"What's happened, Jane?" Thor asked gently. "Ever since the ball last week you two do not speak and you can barely seem to stay in the same room together. The only time you spend any extended amount of time together is when we all have dinner together. Loki has been out every night and coming home late…"

Jane was aware of Loki's penchant for leaving the house and staying out until all hours of the night. He wasn't attending any of the balls the rest of them went to. Jane had a feeling she knew exactly who he was spending his nights with and it upset Jane in a way that made her uncomfortable. Darcy was very informed about what went on between a man and a woman behind closed doors and she had regaled Jane one day all about it. The thought of Loki touching Lady Sigyn in the ways that Darcy had described made her feel wretched.

"Will you tell me what's happened between you two?"

Jane sighed. "If I tell you what happened will you promise not to start lecturing me or making threats against Lord Erik?"

His eyes narrowed. "What does that pompous—" Jane arched her brow and Thor sighed. "Fine. I promise."

"Even if what I tell you involves deception and me acting a tad unladylike?"

Thor drew a deep breath and he looked as though he was digging deep for fortitude. "Yes," he finally said. "Quickly before I change my mind."

Jane told him everything from Loki taking her for an ice at Gunter's to the argument they'd had at the ball. When she was finished Thor remained silent, his mouth in a grim line.

"I do not like Lord Erik," he finally said. "He is no good for you. He's naught but a rake and would make you a poor husband."

"Thor—"

"However, Loki could have handled it better, and should have. Your deception was wrong, but he should have tried another approach."

"He's a bully," Jane muttered.

"You are special to him, Jane. You and he bonded in ways that Loki and I had failed to do. He was away for a very long time and I think he thought he'd return home and you would not have grown at all. I think he wanted you to be his little Jane still and half expected it. Now he's learning otherwise and it's an adjustment for him. His instinct is to protect you, but as usual Loki acts without thinking."

"So what do I do?"

"First, you don't bother with Lord Erik."

"Thor, I mean it. What do I do about Loki?"

"Just talk to him, Jane. He loves you and wants the best for you. I concede he might not ever approve of any man that wishes to wed you, but that man does not have to go through Loki in the first place." Thor grinned at her. "He has to go through me."

"Which is bad enough," Jane said with a smile.

"Indeed. Although I do not wish you to be locked up in a tower where no one can see you."

"When will you wed, Thor?" Jane asked with a sly smile.

Thor laughed, somewhat nervously. "Oh, I do not know…" He stood then and smiled down at her. "Just try not to be too hard on Loki, all right?"

Jane nodded. "I will try."

Yet she couldn't help but wonder that as much as she hated this distance between them, and hated who he might very well be spending his nights with, perhaps this was for the best. Whatever she was feeling needed to put to an end.

When Jane returned to the house sometime after speaking with Thor she was told by the butler that Darcy had just arrived and was in the drawing room waiting for her. Always happy to see her friend, Jane made her way into the drawing room and found not only Darcy, but Loki as well. They were laughing together on the settee, and for a moment Jane felt as though she was intruding. Her smile faltered and she stepped closer to the pair.

"Jane!" Darcy said excitedly, and jumped up to greet her. She kissed Jane's cheek and gestured to Loki. "Your brother was just telling me about the gentleman he saw fall off one of the ships he bought."

Jane looked at Loki. "You bought a ship?"

"Several, actually," Loki replied. "A few need some work so I've been helping down at the docks."

"You know how to repair ships?" Jane asked in astonishment.

"I've learned a few things, and what I don't know I have people to help." He sounded a bit indignant, as though she had just insulted him and Jane, but before she could apologize he stood from the settee and bowed before Darcy. "Good day, Lady Darcy. It was, as always, a pleasure to see you."

He left the room without a word to Jane and the jealousy she felt coupled with the hurt of not even being bid a good day caused tears to sting Jane's eyes.

"Jane, I have something to tell you," Darcy said as soon as Loki had shut the door to the drawing room.

"Yes?" Jane said absently, turning away from her friend to sit down on the settee and discreetly wipe her eyes.

Darcy came over and sat down beside her, her big brown eyes wide with excitement. "I'm in love!"

Jane was shocked. Darcy hadn't ever said she'd set her cap for someone. "Who?"

"Your brother!"

Jane blinked. "Thor? Well, he is a good—"

"No, no. Not Thor. Loki."

Jane stared at her. Blinked. Stared some more. She heard a roaring in her ears and her mouth felt dry. "Loki? My brother Loki?"

"Yes, silly, that's what I just said. What do you think?" Darcy asked eagerly and took Jane's hands. "Do you think you could help me with him?"

Darcy wanted Jane's help with Loki? Loki. Her brother Loki. Loki, who Jane…no. But how could she not? It wasn't as though she could say "No, Darcy, I cannot help you with him because I have these terribly inappropriate feelings for him and I might tear your eyes out if you even so much as touch him".

"Uh, well…"

Darcy dropped her hands and reared back. "Do you think I am not good enough for your brother?"

"No! Not at all," Jane said quickly, while thinking 'Yes'. "It's just that Loki can be a bit…temperamental. He's moody."

"I don't care, I love him. Will you help me or no?"

How could Jane say no? She couldn't. "Of course I'll help you."

Darcy clapped her hands together excitedly. "I'm so glad. Put in a good word for me, will you? I must go now. Mother wants to order some new dresses. What is Loki's favorite color?"

"Green."

Darcy practically floated on air out the door and Jane felt as though someone had pulled the rug out from under her. Darcy had a crush on Loki. And from the way they were laughing together when she walked in, was it possible that Loki returned Darcy's feelings?

The idea that her best friend and her brother should care for another should not bother her as it did. But it did. It was not a normal feeling to have. She should be happy and beyond excited at the idea of her best friend and brother possibly making a match. She should want to see Loki happy with someone.

Someone that was not her.

All right, then. This was a good thing. A very good thing. This meant she could put these feelings for Loki behind her and what better way to do that to help Darcy win his heart? Since Jane could definitely not have Loki in any capacity, then who better than Darcy? Loki would fall for her, she knew he would. How could he not? Darcy was fun, vivacious and lively. Loki seemed to like spirited women and Darcy was nothing if not spirited.

Resolved, Jane nodded to herself and began to plan the best way to help Darcy with Loki.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

Loki's head pounded as he slipped inside the house that night. Sigyn wasn't as happy as he'd thought she'd be with just having some fun (and was he really having fun?). She had started to talk about marriage. When he'd gone quiet on the matter, she'd starting talking more apparently misconstruing his silence for simply having not _heard _her. He'd heard her all right. He just didn't want to.

Even when they were fucking he had to resist the urge to put his hand over her mouth. Sigyn was nothing if not vocal. He'd attempted closing his eyes but then he'd seen Jane in his mind's eye and that had put an end to that right quick.

He was almost to the stairs, ready to stagger up them when he heard Jane's soft voice saying his name. Now he was hearing her in his head, too?

"Loki!"

His head whipped to the side and there she was in her blasted night rail and robe. "Jane, what are you doing up?" he snapped. "You should be in bed along with everyone else."

"You're not," she retorted.

"Must you fight me on everything?" he demanded. His nerved were positively frayed already. The last thing he needed or wanted was Jane arguing with him. "What are you doing up?" he asked again.

"I have to catch you at some point with the hours you keep and then you're sleeping or gone during the day…" She heaved a shaky breath. "I needed to speak to you about something important."

"Jane, are you crying?" he asked, peering into the darkness. The only light shed was the candelabra burning on the table in the foyer.

"No," she said a might too quickly. Then, another sigh. "Yes."

"Why?" he asked, forcing himself to stand still.

"Because we haven't been getting along. Because you're upset with me and you won't even look at me. You do everything you can to avoid me and – and it hurts and I don't know how to make it better. It's like you're gone again only worse because I know you're here but I can't talk to you."

"Jane," he said raggedly and went over to her. He drew her into a hug and shut his eyes, cupping the back of her head with his hand. He stayed still, he would not do anything improper. Not again. He ignored the fact that he could feel…more of her. Yes, she had on a robe, he his suit jacket still, but it was different and he could tell the difference. She smelled like lavender and Jane and he had to force himself to stand still.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry I've been so awful."

"No, no…I haven't been able to accept…" He sighed. "I haven't been able to accept that you're not my little Jane anymore."

"But I am, Loki. I'm still your Jane," she said vehemently and looked at him. "I'll always be your Jane."

But she wasn't. She was something else, and it was the something else that disturbed him. He ached to have things back to normal, to dispel these growing feelings that no amount of drinking and bedding Sigyn could change.

"Do you still love me?" she asked, her eyes welling up in fresh tears.

"Always," he whispered. "I will always love you, Jane."

"Do you forgive me?"

"Yes. Do you forgive me?"

She nodded and hugged him again. She let out a trembling breath and they stood there, entwined, for a long while. Finally, Loki started to ease back before he got a little too comfortable in her embrace.

Jane pulled back first, her hands twisting before her. "I need to speak with you about a delicate matter."

Oh, God. She was getting engaged. Someone had asked for her hand and she was going to accept. Was it Lord Erik?

"It's about Darcy," she said.

Loki blinked. "Pardon?"

"You remember Darcy? You just spoke with her this afternoon."

He nodded and ran a hand through his hair. He winced. Sigyn had pulled it a bit too hard that night. "Yes, yes." He caught a whiff of Sigyn's cloying perfume on him and he wanted nothing more than to be able to fully wash himself before having this conversation with Jane. He felt dirty knowing Jane could probably smell Sigyn on him. He felt as though he was tainting her.

"She thinks herself in love with you," Jane continued, oblivious to his plight.

Loki stopped fidgeting, as if moving would cause Sigyn's scent to fall off him, and stared at Jane. "Pardon?"

"Darcy thinks herself in love with you. I told her I would speak to you on her behalf."

"_Now_?"

"As I said, I can't get you any other time and I thought perhaps if Darcy piqued your interest you would perhaps cease with Lady Sigyn…"

Loki gaped at her. "You know about Sigyn?"

"Everyone does," she said. "I'm sure even Mother knows by now."

He was dirty, there was no longer any question. And just standing here in Jane's presence was sullying her more than Erik Lehnsherr ever could.

"Jane—"

"She comes from a good family, you two seem to get on well – at least that is how it appeared when I saw you speaking with her this afternoon. She's funny and smart…I think it would be a good match if you had any interest…?"

"You wish for me to court Lady Darcy?"

"I would prefer that over Lady Sigyn."

"I think I would prefer Lady Darcy over Sigyn myself. Hell, I would prefer a leper, he muttered. "It would get her off my back in terms of marriage."

Jane started. "Pardon?"

"It seems Lady Sigyn would like me to make an honest woman out of her."

"You cannot be serious."

"I'm afraid I am."

"I will not have that woman as my sister-in-law," Jane said, her voice edged with disgust. "Or as a wife for you. I cannot even imagine her and Mother sharing a dinner table – no, Loki, that must not happen."

"It will not, Jane. I grow weary of her myself."

"Then why – never mind. I do not pretend to understand men."

"And I do not pretend to understand women."

"Do you love her?"

That was a question Loki hadn't been expecting. Love Sigyn? "No, Jane, I do not love her. And I do not believe that she is capable of the sentiment herself. I'm not even sure I am."

"You are," she said softly. "You've just not met the right woman yet."

_And what if the right woman is you? Then what? Then hell for me I suppose, _he thought_. Though I've always known I was meant to burn. _

"Will you consider Darcy?" she asked.

"May I think on it?" he asked. There was much to consider in courting Jane's best friend. Such as Jane and the feelings for her that he couldn't make sense of or rid himself of either. How could he court her best friend? How could in all honesty court any woman feeling as he did…?

However, he had to stop these feelings so what better way to do that than with someone new – someone that wasn't a succubus like Sigyn?

"Yes, of course," Jane said. "Good night, Loki."

"Good night, Jane," he murmured.

As tired as he was, he wasn't ready for sleep. His mind was racing, his feelings amuck. No rest for the wicked, he supposed.

xxxxxxxx

The following afternoon, Loki was as usual not around. He did plan on attending the ball they had all been invited to that evening however, and Jane wondered if this meant he had made his decision regarding Darcy. _It will not bother me seeing Loki and Darcy dancing and talking together, _she told herself._ It will not bother me. They will make a great match. They will get married and have babies and be incredibly happy. Whatever I thought I felt is gone. Completely and utterly gone. _

She frowned at herself in the mirror while her maid pinned her hair into place. She didn't feel like it was gone no matter how much she told herself it was. But, Loki's happiness was important. It mattered to her. If Darcy made Loki happy then Jane would be happy, too. Darcy was far better than Lady Sigyn. At least Darcy wasn't a trollop!

"Did I do something wrong, mi'lady?" her maid asked worriedly.

Jane realized she was now glaring at the mirror as though Lady Sigyn was reflected in it. She shook her head and smiled. "I'm sorry, no. My thoughts took a bad turn is all."

She stood and smiled at her maid, and then made for the door. Time to play the part of matchmaker for Loki and Darcy. Even if killed her.

"Were you able to speak with Loki for me?" Darcy asked as soon as she got a moment to speak with Jane alone.

Jane nodded. "Yes."

Darcy smiled broadly. "What did you say exactly?"

"That you and he would make a wonderful match."

"What did he say?"

"Not much, but it was also late and I haven't seen him all day…" Darcy deflated before Jane's eyes and she felt horrid about it. "Darcy, he promised he would come tonight, but he wasn't home to arrive with us. Let's just wait and see, all right?"

Darcy sighed and nodded, looking utterly crestfallen. "Of course," she said. "If you'll excuse me I think I may get a lemonade."

Jane watched her go, feeling torn. On the one hand Jane didn't want to even watch Loki with a woman no matter who she was, and yet she couldn't very well wish to be the woman he wanted could she? He was her brother.

_Stepbrother. You're not blood. _

Her mind was trying to destroy her.

"You look troubled, Jane. Everything all right with Darcy?" Thor asked as he came up beside her.

"Everything is fine. I am just dreadfully bored by this ball."

"I am as well," Thor sighed.

She looked up at her brother. "You wouldn't be if you danced."

"Who am I to dance with?"

"Lady Sif. She's been watching you ever since you arrived."

Thor looked surprised. "She has?"

Jane rolled her eyes. "My brothers are hopeless," she muttered and headed for the refreshment table. She felt pretty hopeless herself actually.

"Lady Jane."

Jane looked up from the glass of lemonade she was about to pick up off the refreshment table and found Steve standing on the other side of it, grinning at her. "Hello, Lord Steve," she said. "I hope you are quite well."

"I will be if you dance with me."

Jane resisted the urge to shrug. She didn't feel like doing much of anything but sit alone in a room somewhere alone, but she supposed this was better than nothing.

She heard Darcy's loud laugh and looked over her shoulder. Loki had arrived apparently and now he and Darcy were speaking and laughing together. He hadn't even bothered to say hello his family…to her?

Jane felt as though an arrow had lodged itself in her chest. She looked back at Steve and said, "Please just take me away from here."

He smiled. "Done."

Discreetly he led her out of the ballroom and out onto the veranda. Jane placed her hand on the rail and gazed out into the gardens, wishing she could just run to the carriages and go home.

"Jane, I must speak with you about something very important," Steve said earnestly.

Jane sighed inwardly. She didn't want to talk about something 'very important'. She just wanted to be in silence for a while and quiet her thoughts and her emotions that she couldn't seem to control at all lately.

"What is it?" she asked, hoping she didn't sound too snippy.

"I wish to ask for your hand in marriage, Jane. And I hope that you will say yes."

That was the very last thing Jane had expected and all she could do was gape at Steve and ask, very unladylike, "What?!"


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

"I want to marry you, Jane. I love you," Steve said earnestly. He grabbed hold of her hands. "Will you? Marry me, that is?"

Jane's mouth dropped open, but no sound came out. "But – but what about Lady Margaret?"

"I'm not in love with Lady Margaret, Jane. I'm in love with you."

"But you were in love with her!"

He shook his head. "A passing fancy. As I learned more about you, I realized that with you is where my heart lies."

Jane stood there, reeling. Steve was in love with her. And he wanted to marry her! Had Loki not warned her this could end up being the case?

Loki. Loki, her brother whom she had inappropriate feelings for. And now Darcy, her best friend who was in love with Loki. At that moment, Loki could very well be falling in love with Darcy right back.

And now here Steve was, asking for her hand in marriage. He was a good man. A smart man. A kind man. He was handsome and gentle and treated her like a queen. He would be a good husband.

He was an escape.

And yet, she couldn't force herself to say yes, she would marry him. The words were trapped in her throat.

She wanted to go home. She wanted to hide. She wanted to think clearly and feel differently.

"Jane?" Steve said with concern. "Are you well?"

"No, I'm not well. I feel ill."

His face fell. "Because of me?"

"No, I – no. It's sudden, yes, but it's not you, Steve. I just – I need to think and I haven't been feeling well all day…"

"Shall I escort you inside so that your brother can take you home?"

"Yes, yes, I think that is probably best," she said and nodded.

"Might I call on you tomorrow, Jane?" Steve asked as he maneuvered them through the crush of the ball.

"Perhaps," she said vaguely and felt her heart ache. She liked Steve so very much and the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him.

"Lord Asgard," Steve said as he came up to Thor, "Lady Jane is feeling unwell and wishes to return home."

Thor immediately looked down at Jane worriedly and pulled her away from Steve. "Jane, what is wrong?"

"I do not feel right, Thor, just as Lord Steve said. I wish to return home."

Frigga came up beside her son then, and looked at Jane. "Darling, what's wrong?"

Jane held back the tears that were close to falling. "I do not feel well, Mother, and I wish to go home."

"My darling, what is it?" Frigga asked and put her hand to Jane's head. "You do not feel warm. What is it, Jane?"

"I… I am hot and my head aches…"

"I will take her home," Thor said.

"I will come," Frigga said.

"No, Mother, no," Jane said hurriedly. "Stay. I just need to rest. Please, don't leave. Stay and have fun with your friends. Please."

Frigga frowned. "Jane, as your Mother I am to go with you."

"Mother, it's all right," Thor said, "I will see Jane home. I will stay with her as well. I will send the carriage back and send word if we need you."

Frigga didn't look convinced.

"Really, Mother, it's fine," Jane said.

Frigga sighed. "Fine. But please, Thor, if she is not doing well—"

"I will send word," Thor vowed.

Frigga hugged her daughter and kissed the side of her head. "Rest, my darling."

"I will," Jane promised.

Thor wrapped an arm about Jane's shoulders and began to lead her to the doors. "Come, my dear, let's get you home."

"Thor, really, you do not have to escort me home. Just put me in our carriage and send me on my way. There is no reason you should have to leave."

"I want to," he said with a smile. Jane smiled back at her brother and wished with all her might she could feel the sisterly feelings she felt for Thor for Loki too.

xxxxxxx

"Should I be concerned that you were with Lord Steve on the veranda?" Thor asked once Jane was settled into bed with a book and hot tea.

Jane bit her lip. "No."

Thor arched his brows and she arched hers back until he laughed. "Jane, I am not like Loki. I will not chastise you like a child. However, you are a lady and I do not want—"

"He asked me to marry him," Jane blurted out. Not only did she not want to hear a lecture, but she also needed to tell someone, anyone, about her marriage proposal.

Thor looked as stunned as Jane had felt earlier. "What did you say?" Then his brow furrowed. "He should be talking to me first, dammit!"

Jane started at Thor's sudden furious outburst. "Are you angry?"

"Yes! He should be speaking to me first before—"

"No, Thor, he shouldn't. I'm the one that will answer yea or nay. It is up to me first, then he may speak to you."

"You know very well that is not how it's done."

"Oh, bother," Jane retorted. "I'm the one that has the decision to make!"

"So do I! I have the decision to make on whether or not Lord Steve is good enough for you!"

"And to settle the matter of my dowry of course," Jane spat.

"I do not care about the money, Jane. I care about your well-being."

Jane folded her arms across her chest.

"Jane," Thor said, now gentle. "Do you love him?"

She softened and looked at Thor, tears stinging her eyes. "I…I think I could learn to?"

"Are you asking me if you could or telling me you could?"

"I'm not sure. He is a good man, Thor. I think he would make an excellent husband."

"Yes, but is he the husband you would want?"

Tears spilled down her cheeks. "I do not know. I am frightened."

"Of what, dearest?"

"Everything. Of everything changing. I like things the way they are. I like us all together for the first time in so long and I…I don't want to grow up and be a wife."

"Jane, we will always be a family. Nothing can change that. Marrying someone just means our family expands. What did you tell him?"

Jane felt as though nothing was ever going to be the same and she couldn't very well tell Thor why. "I didn't answer him. I couldn't. I was too shocked…" She wiped at her eyes. "I think I need sleep, Thor," she said and laid back. "I must be over tired to have become so emotional."

"I will stay for when you wake up."

"You do not have to do that," she told him.

"I want to. You are distraught and I wish to be here at home in case you have need of me."

She smiled sadly. "Thank you."

Thor stood and pressed a brotherly kiss to Jane's forehead. "Sleep now, Jane."

Jane watched him leave and then settled back further into the covers. She did feel rather exhausted, actually. It was all these feelings she was carrying around, and feeling somehow dirty for having those feelings. She sat up to blow out the candle on her nightstand and tossed her book to the floor before burrowing under the covers and praying for sleep.

xxxxxxxx

Loki and Frigga entered the house a short time after Jane had fallen asleep. Frigga had not been able to relax knowing Jane was feeling ill, and Loki had barely been able to hide his eagerness to get home after hearing that Jane was unwell.

"Jane?" Loki called out as soon as he and Frigga stepped inside. "Thor?"

Thor came out of the study. "Loki, Mother! What is wrong?"

"Is Jane well? Where is she? Mother said she was feeling unwell and you took her home," Loki said, peering behind Thor into the study.

"She is upstairs sleeping right now," Thor said.

"I will check on her," Frigga said and made her way to the stairs.

"What's the matter with her? Should we call a doctor?" Loki asked worriedly.

"Calm down, Loki. Jane is all right. She is just feeling the fear of growing up."

Loki stared at him. "Excuse me?"

Thor glanced towards the stairs. Their Mother was already out of sight. He leaned toward Loki and said, "Lord Steve asked her if she'd marry him."

Loki's hand went to his heart and he stepped back, feeling as though Thor had just struck him. "He…he asked her to marry him?"

Thor nodded.

"What did she say?"

"She has not given him an answer." Thor cocked his head to the side and furrowed his brow. "Loki, are you all right?"

"I…I need to…" Loki mumbled and headed for the stairs.

"Loki?"

"I'm fine," Loki all but snapped. He made his way up to his bedchamber, forcing himself not to run to Jane's room. He didn't want her to get married. At all. Ever. He knew it had to happen, but he wasn't ready…would he ever be ready for that?

Once in his bedchamber he poured himself a drink. His hands were shaking. He'd gone to the ball tonight deciding that he would try to get to know Darcy better. Maybe see if he could feel something for her that would replace what he'd been feeling for Jane. So many times he'd wanted to go over to Jane and just bask in her presence, but he'd stopped himself. These feelings had to stop.

What was Jane going to do? Was she going to accept Lord Steve's proposal? His stomach churned even as he knocked back the rest of his drink and poured another.

xxxxxx

It was late by the time Loki made his way into Jane's bedroom. He was not drunk, at least not any longer. He was tense and anxious, and though his body was tired, his mind would not stop. He kept thinking about what it would mean if Jane accepted Lord Steve's proposal. Would they move to the country or stay in the city? Would they live far or close? How often would he be able to see her? Would Lord Steve make her a good husband? If he harmed Jane in any way, Loki would kill him with his bare hands.

Would these riotous feelings for her cease?

Loki placed the candle he held in his hand down upon her night stand and gazed down at his slumbering Jane. What was he even doing here? What was his plan – to wake her? She would wonder why he was here. What could he say? The idea of her marrying Lord Steve – or anyone for that matter – pained him. It also made him feel violent and angry and out of control. His hands shook with the need to pull her to him and hold on tight.

He reached out a hand to touch her. Just to let her know he was there. Maybe he could convince her to not marry Lord Steve. No doubt she would accuse him of trying to run her life again.

There wasn't much he could do. Make a plea in the middle of the night for her to remain untethered to any man, ever? She would think him mad. So would Mother and Thor. They'd want to know why he was so violently opposed to Jane marrying. What could he tell them? That he suspected he was…

God, he couldn't even think it! And if he said it? Mother and Thor would banish him to the ends of the Earth for thinking of Jane in such a way!

There was nothing he could do. Jane was his sister, she was of marriageable age, and she was his _sister_.

He grabbed his candle and left the room, heavy-hearted.


	11. Chapter 11

The following morning after a lie in and a bath, Jane dressed and went downstairs to see if there was still food from breakfast left to be had. She found only Thor in the dining room sipping on coffee.

"Am I too early or too late?" she asked as she sat down beside him.

He smiled at her. "Too late. I had Cook hold a plate for you downstairs. Let me ring for it."

She smiled. "Thank you, Thor."

"How do you feel?" he asked and went to the bell pull on the wall.

She sighed. "I'm not sure."

"My Lord," the butler said as he entered the room. "Lord Steve Rogers is here to see you."

Jane started, and felt her appetite leave her.

"Send him to the study," Thor said and stood, already looking stern. "Stay here, Jane."

She swallowed hard and nodded.

"Do you know your answer today, Jane?" he asked. She shook her head, eyes wide with worry, and Thor nodded. "It will be all right, dearest," he promised and left the room.

Curious, Jane got up and went to the door, peering out. She wanted to see how Lord Steve looked. Was he hopeful? Nervous? Determined?

She saw nothing. She went back into the dining room and sat down. She stared at her plate and felt no desire to eat any of it anymore.

"Jane."

She looked over at the sound of Loki's voice and she attempted a smile. "Good morning, brother."

Did she imagine his wince? "Good morning." He sat down beside her and placed a hand over hers. "How does the morning find you, Jane?"

Her eyes welled up in tears as she stared at his hand over hers.

"Jane, darling, what is it?" Loki asked concernedly. "Is it…Thor told me about Lord Steve."

She nodded. "You were right, Loki. I never should have kissed him."

"What will your answer be?"

"I do not know what I shall do," she admitted. "Mother likes him and I think Thor does as well. They are in the study now as we speak."

Loki looked at her. "Pardon?"

"Lord Steve is here. He's speaking with Thor."

His face turned into a veritable thundercloud. "He didn't waste any blood time, did he?" He gripped Jane's hand and she looked at him. "If you don't want to marry him, Jane, you don't have to. If Mother and Thor don't like it, then too bad. I will take care of you, you needn't worry about anything, dearest. If you want to never marry, you can. I'll purchase a home for us and you'll never want for anything."

A sob escaped Jane. "That does sound quite nice. If not unrealistic. You know Mother would never allow me to become permanently on the shelf."

"I love Mother, Jane, I do, but I don't care what she wants. All that matters is what _you_ want—"

"Jane. Lord Steve would like a word," Thor said as he entered the room. He was wearing his _I am the Lord of the Manor_ face. He looked all sorts of stern and severe.

Jane nodded and swallowed hard, feeling as though she was heading for the gallows.

Loki gripped her hand tighter. "Remember what I said."

She stood and looked at Thor. "And what is the verdict then, Thor?"

Thor smiled gently down at her and tapped the tip of her nose with his finger. "Whatever you want to do, Jane. I leave this in your very capable hands. Whatever your decision I will support you."

Jane felt some relief at that, but only some. She knew what Mother would want. She looked down at Loki who said, "You can say no."

She could. She could live in that house Loki wanted to purchase for them. She could stay on the shelf and long for her brother in ways she should not. She could watch him marry Darcy, or some other woman, and be a nanny to his kids. It would kill her.

Or she could marry Steve and hope that in time, she could fall in love with him. He was a good man. She could do it.

Heaving a deep breath, Jane made her way out of the room.

xxxxxxxx

"Did that peacock come here to ask you for Jane's hand in marriage?" Loki asked Thor, barely able to keep the sneer out of his voice.

Thor sat down at the dining room table and looked at Loki. "I'd hardly call him a peacock."

"Did he ask you or not?" Loki demanded in exasperation.

"Loki, calm down. I understand that you are protective of Jane, but it is getting a little ridiculous. You act more like—" Thor shook his head and picked the newspaper back up. "Just calm down."

"Just tell me what was said, please," Loki said, trying his best to sound calm.

Thor looked at him again over the newspaper and arched a brow. "I don't think you've ever said 'please' to anything before."

xxxxxxx

When Jane entered the study she felt as though her heart was going to leap out of her chest. She feared Steve asking her to marry him again because she feared having to come up with an answer. The part of her that had all these feelings for Loki commanded her to say no, which then brought her to her next problem: Loki was her brother.

She felt at war with herself between doing what was right and giving in to what she knew had to be wrong. Granted, even doing what was right was fraught with perils as well.

No. She would tell Steve no then.

Jane opened her mouth to stop him from speaking, to stop him from asking and Steve held up a hand. "I'm not going to ask you to marry me," he said.

Relief flooded through her and she pressed her hand to her heart. She felt oddly winded. "You're not?"

"No." He gestured to the settee beside her. "Will you have a seat please, Jane?"

Jane sat and looked up at Steve expectantly.

xxxxxxx

"Well?" Loki persisted.

Thor sighed and rolled his eyes. "He asked permission to court Jane, that is all."

Loki stared at his brother. "Court Jane?"

"Yes, court Jane."

"What did you tell him?"

"That it was up to her."

xxxxxxx

"I realized my error in asking for your hand in marriage, Jane," Steve said as he stood before her. "We are friends, yes, but our time spent together at the balls we attended were spent at first with you trying to garner Lord Erik's attention, and me trying to garner Lady Margaret's. We shared a few kisses, but on the pretense of practicing rather than admitting or perhaps for you, even being curious about any real interest."

"I'm following you," Jane said slowly, her hands folded in her lap before her. "What exactly is it that you are saying?"

"I came here today to ask your brother –and you, of course – if I could have permission to court you."

Jane blinked. "Court me?"

Steve nodded. "Court you."

"So this is all up to me then that's what Thor said?" Jane asked.

"Yes. So? What do you say?"

xxxxxxx

Loki did his best to act normal. To not pace while he waited to hear what Jane's answer would be to allowing Steve to court her. It was better than marriage, yes, but…God damn! This was hard. He'd never felt so violent, as though he could lay destruction to the house with his bare hands at the very thought of losing Jane forever.

Not that he had her…or could have her. Not the way he wanted. He'd meant what he'd said though, about purchasing them a home where they could live out their days. It would be enough for him just to have Jane close by. That's what he told himself anyway.

Would it be enough for her though?

He heard voices in the foyer and got up to see if it was Jane and Steve. It was. He stood in the doorway, impatiently waiting. Jane was smiling and so was Lord Steve.

Once Lord Steve had departed and Jane turned and saw Loki, her smile fell. "Well?" Loki asked.

"Loki, leave Jane be!" Thor called out from the dining room.

"I've agreed to let him court me," Jane said.

Loki considered going after Lord Steve, warning the young buck away from Jane. He even considered threatening him.

_I could threaten him…_

"Jane?" Thor asked from behind Loki. "What did you say?"

"She's allowed him to court her," Loki answered for her.

"And you are certain this is what you want?" Thor asked.

Jane nodded, but she didn't look certain at all. Or perhaps that was just Loki's wishful thinking.

"For what it's worth I think you made the right decision, and I am duly impressed with Lord Steve coming to ask me if he could court you," Thor said.

Jane smiled, though it was forced. Loki knew Jane's smiles well, and this one was fake. "If you'll excuse me, I need some air," she said.

"Of course, dearest," Thor said and Jane all but ran to the door.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

Over the next few days Jane didn't see much of Loki. While she missed him terribly, she also knew that if she had any hope of getting over these feelings for him then she had best start now. She just wished it wasn't so hard. She wished she could muster some kind of feeling for Steve, but in actuality their courting period had just begun. So far he had called on her the day after she'd agreed to let him court her, and now, today, they were taking a trip into Hyde Park in his carriage. Her maid was in the backseat as a chaperone.

Jane wished everything could go back to normal. She wanted to feel for Loki what she felt for Thor: sisterly affection. If Loki even know how she felt about him it would be a disaster. He'd probably turn his back on her in disgust. And why wouldn't he? It would be what she deserved.

"You're quiet this afternoon," Steve observed as he looked over at her from where he sat beside her on the carriage.

Jane pulled herself from her maudlin thoughts and forced herself to smile. "Am I? I apologize. I'm just admiring the day."

"It is rather beautiful," Steve said and then grinned. "Though not as beautiful as you."

Jane smiled weakly, wishing she could feel something about his compliment. She felt more watching Loki come in to grab a quick breakfast on his way to the docks in the morning than she did being paid a compliment by the man beside her.

"And here we are," Steve said as they slowed down to enter Hyde Park. As per usual, everyone looked to see who had just arrived and with whom. Most outings in London were about seeing and being seen and Jane's mind reeled with how fast it would spread that Steve was courting her.

"Are you all right, Jane? You look a bit pale?" Steve asked her.

"I—I'm fine. I could perhaps use a refreshment."

"Say no more, my lady," he said with a grin and turned the carriage to Gunter's.

Fifteen minutes later, Jane felt a bit calmer, but still ready to go home. She had to find a way to tell Steve that this was not going to work. He deserved to find someone that wasn't using him to get over someone else, and she feared there was no getting over Loki. Not even the idea of Lord Erik Lehnsherr produced any spark of interest.

"Jane! Say, Jane!"

Jane looked over her shoulder and found Darcy and Loki coming toward them in one of the family carriages. What the devil—? Oh. That's right. Loki and Darcy. She'd pushed Loki to court Darcy and now it seemed he'd chosen to.

Her heart ached. Darcy was beaming at Loki as though he had set the sun in the sky and Loki looked…well, he actually looked a bit uncomfortable.

"H—hello, Loki. Darcy," Jane managed to say.

"Well, hello, Lord Loki and Lady Darcy. Nice day for a ride is it not?" Steve said cordially.

"It is," Loki agreed. He looked at Jane. "How do you fare, dear heart?"

Jane forced herself to smile. "I'm well, Loki. I didn't know you would be calling on Darcy today."

"I didn't quite know it myself," he murmured and jumped down from the carriage. "Lady Darcy, would you like an ice?"

Jane watched Loki go and wished she could follow him. She looked away. It wouldn't do to be caught staring after him longingly. She put her ice down on the seat beside her and swiped a hand across her forehead. She wanted to take her bonnet off. She felt hot and her head was beginning to pound.

"Jane?" Steve asked softly and leaned in close to her. "Are you well?"

Jane nodded and smiled shakily. "Yes, I am just a tad warm."

"Let me take you home then," Steve said and put his ice down on the floor. He grabbed Jane's and put it down next to his.

Jane bid adieu to Darcy and Steve took her home, which was where she had wanted to be all along in the first place.

xxxxxxxxxxx

After saying goodbye, Jane all but ran inside the house. She had placed her foot on the first step of the stairs to run up to her room when she heard Frigga calling to her.

She turned and looked at the woman that had claimed Jane as her own after Jane's parents had perished in a carriage accident. Frigga was her Mother. She was the one that tended to Jane's scrapes and comforted her when she saw things in the dark. Frigga was the one that taught her about her courses and all the things she needed to know as a woman. What would Frigga think if she knew how Jane felt about Loki? She might turn her back on Jane. She might think Jane an evil temptress that could corrupt Loki and send him in a spiral of sin.

That was actually quite laughable. From the bits and pieces she had been able to piece together from Loki's travels from eavesdropping on he and Thor, Loki was the corrupter, not the corrupted. But still, Frigga didn't see Loki that way. She was his mother. He was of her blood. Jane was not. Frigga could banish Jane from this house if she knew.

Jane knew all too well what happened to women abandoned by their families.

"Sweetheart, did you have fun with Lord Steve?" Frigga asked.

Jane lunged at her mother, nearly toppling them both over. She hugged Frigga tight. "I love you, Mother."

"I love you, too, dearest!" Frigga said with a surprised laugh. "What brought this on?"

Jane shook her head. "Nothing, I just – I am just happy that you are my Mother."

Frigga smiled and kissed Jane in the middle of her forehead. "I am happy as well, my dear. Tell me, did you have fun with Lord Steve?"

Jane shrugged.

"Oh, that does not sound promising," Frigga said with a frown. "Did you happen to see your brother and Darcy? She came over almost as soon as you'd left to see you. Loki decided to take her for a ride to Hyde Park to see you."

"Yes, I saw them. But it was so hot outside and not even the ice was helping so Lord Steve took me home."

Frigga frowned. "You did not feel well at the ball and now, today. Are you ill, Jane? Should I send for a doctor?"

"No, no, I will be fine. It is just the heat I think. I'm going to lie down for a bit upstairs."

Frigga nodded. "I will have one of the maids bring up cold compresses for you."

Jane nodded and smiled. "Thank you, Mother."

Jane ran up the stairs and down to her bedchamber. She kicked off her shoes and ripped off her bonnet and threw herself onto her bed, face down. She hugged her pillow under head and turned to look out the window. She shut her eyes and breathed deep in an effort to relax.

She had to put an end to Steve courting her and she didn't know how. She had to warn Loki about Darcy before Darcy got hurt. She buried her face in her pillow and squeezed her eyes tight.

She jumped when she felt something cold against her neck. She flipped onto her bum and found Loki standing beside her bed. He looked concerned. "Darcy said Lord Steve took you home because you weren't feeling well."

She shook her head. "I wasn't."

He knelt by the bed and looked at her with a sympathetic smile. "What's wrong, dearest?"

She wanted to tell him. Wanted to purge what she felt right out of her system and get rid of it once and for all so that maybe, just maybe she could start to get over it. But she couldn't. She dare not. So, she simply shook her head and felt her eyes sting with tears.

"Sweetheart, please, talk to me," Loki begged softly. "I can't bear to see you so upset."

Jane was afraid if she spoke she would give into the tears so she said nothing, just pursed her lips together in an effort to keep herself under control. She nearly lost it when Loki moved even closer, his forehead bumping against her cheek. "Talk to me, Jane…"

She moved away from him and sat up. She looked at him, still on his knees. "It's nothing – I am well, truly. I promise, Loki, I just – I think I am just tired. I haven't been sleeping well."

He didn't look as though he believed her. "If you are not happy with this arrangement regarding Lord Steve then I want you to tell me so we can put an end to it. You have not been yourself since you agreed to let him court you and I do not like it." He attempted a smile. "I want my Jane back."

She smiled weakly. "I am still here, Loki. You haven't really been around much…"

He nodded and got up, then sat down on her bed facing her. He handed her the ice he'd wrapped in a cloth and she took it, toying with the ends of the cloth.

"I have been busy," he said, but there was something in his tone and in the look on his face that suggested he was keeping something from her as well.

Her cheeks turned red as she thought that he could mean he'd been busy with Lady Sigyn. Her temper sparked. "Please tell me that you have not been seeing that – _that woman_."

He looked confused and then his expression cleared and he shook his head. "No, Jane, no. I have not seen Lady Sigyn."

"Oh, don't even speak her name," Jane growled and climbed out of the bed, leaving the ice on her bed. "I hate her."

Loki's brow quirked. "What's gotten into you?"

She pursed her lips together and shook her head. "Nothing. So, have you decided to court Darcy then?"

Loki sighed and looked away from her. He looked rather tired himself. "I've made no decisions."

"Is there another? Woman, I mean?" she asked, fearing the answer.

He looked at her. "No."

"Loki, do you think that I could, that is, do you think that I could see the ships you've purchased? See where you spend your days working?" She didn't understand herself one whit. Here she was wishing she could put her feelings for Loki behind her and thinking that spending time away from him was best and now, here she was, asking to spend time with him!

He looked surprised. "You want to see where I work?"

She nodded. "Please?"

His smile this time was genuine. Sweet and genuine and pleased. "As if I could deny you anything," he said. "But now? I thought you didn't feel well."

"I feel much better now," she said quickly. He arched a brow and she rolled her eyes. "Just leave it be, Loki, for now. Please? Can we just go?"

He stood and walked over to her and tapped her on the nose. "Yes, you silly thing. We can go."


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

Jane had never been down to the docks as it was not a place for ladies. Darcy told her that only a certain kind of "lady" visited the docks and for very specific reasons. Jane had stopped her before she could regale her with the details. At the time Jane hadn't wanted to be scandalized by this knowledge Darcy was somehow privy to. She now wondered what Darcy would say if her friend knew about how Jane felt about Loki.

"You're to never come down here alone," Loki warned her as he helped her down from the carriage.

"Yes, Loki, I know," she said with a little laugh.

He pulled her into his side and pointed to one of the buildings on the wharf. "You see that top window? That's where my office is."

Jane smiled as she looked up at him. She could hear the pride in his voice and see it on his face. "I'm so proud of you, Loki," she said.

He looked down at her and Jane realized then just how close they were. He need only bend his head a little and he could kiss her. She could smell that heady combination of bergamot and mint on him and her heart started to pound hard in her chest. She wondered what would happen if she was the one that bridged the gap between them…

Loki pulled away and placed his hand on the small of her back, pushing her forward and breaking the moment. Had it indeed been a moment? Or just one she'd created in her head?

He guided her onto the wharf and then up to the building he worked in. Up and up they went until they arrived at his office, which was really two offices. The main one that greeted the captains that sailed for him.

"I hired a gentleman by the name of Mr. Tavistock Hammerstone to ensure that the crew checks in, reports any problems, and gives them their assignments. I do everything else – the books, setting up the cargo, and hiring men for repairs on the ships."

His office wasn't much – a desk with a chair and another chair in the corner. There were papers all over his desk.

"You need something in here to brighten it up," Jane surmised. "Something from home."

Loki grinned. "What would you suggest then? One of your paintings?"

Jane made a face. "I am an awful painter, Loki."

"Not so terrible," he said. "What did you do with the painting of our home in Derbyshire?"

"I believe I stuck it under my bed," Jane said with a giggle. "Never to be looked upon again."

"Could I have it?"

"You actually want that dreadful thing?"

"It's not dreadful," Loki said with a smile. He pointed to the wall to his left. "I could hang it right there."

"No, Loki, if you are going to hang it then it must be right here," Jane said as she pointed to the spot right across his desk, in direct line of it. She stood in the spot and beamed at him. "This way whenever you look up from your books you'll see it and be reminded of home."

"I wonder if I could filch one of the smaller portraits of you to put on my desk," he said softly.

He wanted a picture of her with him? What did that mean? _It means you're his sister and he loves you, _she scolded herself. _But_, she countered in her head, _he singled me out. Not Mother and Thor. Just me._

Her heart started to pound even harder as they just stood there, staring at one another. Was something passing between them? Was it possible Loki felt something as well? Maybe she wasn't imagining it?

But then he stepped out from behind his desk and opened his door. "Come, let me show you some of my ships."

_No_, she thought, _I'm just making it all up because God forgive me, but I think I'm falling in love with my brother._

**xxxxxxxx**

The cool sea air did little to calm Loki and his racing heart. This, spending time with Jane, was what he'd craved. Yet, it was a double edged sword for as much as he enjoyed his time with Jane, it was a sore reminder of the things he wanted with her and could not have. He knew now what it was that he felt for her.

Love. He was in love with Jane and he didn't know what to do about it. He had considered kidnapping her – taking her away to a place where no one would know they were related to start a life together with her. More and more he thought of building a house for them, just them, so Jane would not have to marry anyone at all (nor would he) and they could spend their days – their life – together.

This courting business with Lord Steve was upsetting her and Loki just wanted to make it go away for her. When they were kids, he slayed the dragons for her. He made the monsters in her room go away. He was the one she turned to. Now, he felt the monster that needed slaying for wanting her as he did. For loving her as he did. Yet there was a part of him that simply did not care. That wanted to be reckless and claim her as his.

The only thing that stopped him was her. If he declared himself and she was horrified by it, then what? He'd have to leave again. He didn't want to leave again. Didn't want to leave _her_ again. Then, there were moments when he thought maybe…maybe she felt something, too. The way he caught her looking at him something. The way she hated Sigyn, but didn't seem very keen on his courting Darcy either. But was that just wishful thinking? Was he putting his feelings on her because then he wouldn't feel so…so _alone_.

Now, she stood with him, her arm around him and his around her, her head on his shoulder. Loki could almost suspend belief that they were together as a couple in love.

"Are you happy to be home? Does this job make you happy?" she asked softly.

"Yes and yes," he replied. "Did you know I missed you terribly while I was gone?"

"And I you. Why did you have to stay away for so long, Loki?"

"You know why."

She sighed. "There truly was nothing that could have been done to mend the rift between you and Father?"

"I do not think so."

"Are you at all…sorry now? That neither of you tried?"

Loki sighed. "Yes. And that's all I wish to say about it."

Silence, then, "But you'll not leave again?"

"No." _Not without you._

"Promise."

"I promise, Jane. I won't…I won't go anywhere and not take you with me."

Her arms around him tightened, and he tightened his in response. He was unaware of the tears that fell from her cheeks as she wondered what would become of them.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

The last thing Jane wanted to do was go to a ball, even if it was one that her family was putting on. That pretty much determined that she had to be there, and she was, but she was not having fun. She played the part she was supposed to, but enjoyed none of it.

She was tired – emotionally, mentally, and physically. And she knew that she was physically tired because she wasn't sleeping well. Thoughts of her future as Steve's wife and Loki as Darcy's husband kept her up at night. She was ready to tear her hair out from the roots. She had seen Loki more since that day at the docks, but it was difficult with all these feelings she had for him and not being able to say anything or do anything them.

At the ball, she danced with Steve and other men that asked. She must have done a good job fooling everyone because at one point, Steve pulled her aside and demanded to know why she was flirting with other men.

"I'm _not_ flirting with other men," Jane hissed at him. "I'm having _fun_, Steve, or at least trying to."

"For the past three weeks you've been quiet and sullen. We go for rides and walks and you barely even look at me or talk to me, and now tonight you seem to enjoy the attention of every other man in the room. Are you trying to tell me something, Jane?"

Frustration over the past month bubbled up within Jane and finally, she had reached the end of her rope. "Yes. I don't want this courtship any longer. I've had enough. I don't love you and I never will." It came out much harsher than she'd wanted, but she'd had enough. Enough of pining for a man she couldn't have, enough of worrying about her future as a wife to someone she didn't love, enough of being courted by Steve – she'd had it.

He looked stricken and stepped back away from her as though she'd struck him. Feeling guilty and still very angry and frustrated, she stormed out of the ball, not caring anymore if she made a scene or caused tongues to wag.

Jane made her way down the stairs and ordered the butler to ready a carriage for her. She wanted to go to the Odinson home in Derbyshire _now_. She then wrangled her maid to help her prepare for the trip. Her mother would be angry with her. So would Thor. Loki would worry about her, and the desire to just find solace in him was overwhelming. Yet, she knew that was setting a dangerous course, which just added to her frustration. She was done. Absolutely done.

"Jane, open the door."

Thor. Jane marched over to her bedchamber door and whipped her door open. "Yes?"

"What the devil are you doing? You left the ball."

"I'm going home," she said.

"You are home," he told her.

"No. I'm going home to Derbyshire."

"When?"

"Tonight."

"Tonight?!"

"I've already asked that a carriage be readied and I'm packing now."

"Jane, what in the hell happened in there to make you decide to leave the ball and pack to leave tonight for home?"

Jane threw up her arms. "Because I've had it, Thor. I'm done with this blasted Season. Steve just had the audacity to ask me why I was flirting with every man in the room when I _wasn't_ and I'm tired of being a little puppet on the string. I don't want him to court me and I told him as such. I don't love him and I never will love him and no amount of time is going to change that!"

Thor stepped inside her room and shut the door behind him. He attempted to take stiff and unyielding Jane in his arms for comforting and she pushed away from him to return to packing. He followed her inside.

"Jane, stop. Calm down. Listen to me. You cannot leave tonight. It's not safe. If you want to go tomorrow still you may. I'll even escort you home to see that you get there safely."

Jane paused in her packing and turned to him. "Will Mother let me go?"

"It doesn't matter now, does it? You've told Lord Steve how you feel and I suppose that is the end of it. Perhaps you need a break from Society for a while. I know quite well how it can be tiresome."

Jane sighed heavily and nodded. She down on her bed. "I don't know that I ever want to marry, Thor."

"Now let's not get ahead of ourselves," he said with a chuckle. "You need a break, I'll give you that, but don't give up all hope of marrying. The right man just hasn't come along yet."

_Yes, he has, _Jane thought desolately. _But I can't have him. _

"I'll talk to Mother," Thor told her. "It'll be all right, Jane. Just take a rest tonight, all right?"

Jane nodded.

"We'll leave first light if you want."

Jane nodded again. "I do."

xxxxxxxxx

The following morning when Jane came down, dressed and ready to go, she found Thor and Frigga waiting for her in the foyer. The carriage, Thor informed her, was ready. Her things were on board, and as soon as she was ready to leave, they would be off.

"Where's Loki?" Jane asked.

"Still abed I'm sure," Frigga told her as she embraced Jane.

"I think he was in his cups last night. I told him you were leaving for home today, and he mentioned going with you. He also mentioned having some business to take care of before he could…I'm not sure what his plans are," Thor said with a frown.

"I am disappointed that things did not work out with Lord Steve," Frigga said. Jane knew that already for Frigga had come the night before after Thor had left to check on her. Frigga had expressed her disappointment then, and while she thought Jane was making a mistake, she had told Jane that if she wanted to go home to Derbyshire, she was free to.

"I know, Mother," Jane murmured.

"But a break is what you need. So a break is what you'll have."

Jane smiled weakly.

"I'll return home sometime tomorrow," Thor told Frigga. "Jane will be fine in Derbyshire alone with the servants. We won't be but a week or so behind her."

Frigga frowned. "Yes, though I do not like the idea of leaving her alone like that."

"I'll be fine, Mother," Jane assured her. "Time alone will do me good."

Frigga smiled gently. "Perhaps. Off with you now."

They hugged one last time and then Thor and Jane departed. Jane tried not to let it bother her that Loki had not come down in time to say goodbye.

xxxxxxxx

Loki ran down the stairs at breakneck speed, his coat not even on fully. "Jane!" he shouted. "Thor!"

It was his mother that came out of the drawing room looking alarmed. "Loki, what in the world?"

"Did they leave already?" Loki asked frantically as he hastily pulled his arm through his coat. "Did I miss them?"

"I'm afraid so, dear. By at least ten minutes."

Loki sighed and hunched his shoulders. "Blast! I wanted to let Jane know I would join her as soon as I finished up a few things at the docks."

"Thor said you might do that. Don't worry, my dear, you'll see her soon enough."

Loki sighed. He hated the idea of Jane leaving and not being able to say goodbye to her. He hoped she didn't think he didn't care that she'd left a few weeks before the Season ended. Thor had told him how she had reached the end of her tether the night before. Loki had attempted to visit her, but by the time he'd gotten there, Jane had already been asleep. And then this morning he had overslept before he could see her off. He liked that she would no longer be courted by Lord Steve, but didn't like that she was so obviously upset. He wanted to assure her that all would be well; he would see to it.

The more he'd thought last night of heading off to their country estate with her, the more Loki had liked the plan. He could be alone with Jane. He would have her all to himself – what was there not to like about that arrangement? Sure, the temptation would be great, but still. There would be no one but them and he longed for that.

"Besides," Frigga continued, "Is there really any reason to go so quickly? You and Lady Darcy seem to be getting on quite well." Her smile was conspiratorial. "Could there be a match in the offing?"

_God no_, Loki thought. "I don't think so, Mother. I don't see Lady Darcy and I making a match."

Frigga frowned. "Not at all?"

"I'm afraid not."

She sighed. "Will any of my children ever marry and give me grandchildren?"

Loki laughed and hugged his mother. "There is time enough for that."

"I fear there isn't. Jane is practically on the shelf as it is."

Loki looked at his mother a bit sternly. "I would rather Jane remain on the shelf than marry someone she doesn't love."

"I don't think she gave Lord Steve much of a chance—"

"He had enough of a chance," Loki said. "Jane can't force herself to feel something she does not."

Frigga arched a brow. "My, how protective you are of her."

_I love her_, Loki thought. "If you'll excuse me, Mother. I need to get down to the docks and take care of a few things so that I may join Jane."

Frigga smiled and patted her son's cheek. "A girl could not ask for a better, more doting brother than you."

_If you only knew_, Loki thought as he made his way out of the house.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

"How do you feel, dearest?" Thor asked Jane the following morning after they'd arrived at their country estate.

Jane sipped her chocolate. "I slept wonderfully last night."

Thor smiled at her over his cup of coffee. "That wasn't really an answer."

"Sure it is. I am rested. I feel rested. You've no idea how good that feels after all the balls and Steve taking me out…" _And pining for what I cannot have…_

"So you've no regrets then?"

Jane sighed. "For myself, no. I just worry about Mother. I know how eager she was for me to wed Steve."

"Trust me, Jane, she wouldn't have wanted you to be miserable. Besides, if things go as well as they seem with Loki and Lady Darcy, there could be a match made this season after all."

Jane tried to appear nonchalant even though inside she felt shaken by that comment. "Has he said anything to you about it?"

"No, but they did dance last night and Lady Darcy seemed rather bent on staying close to him. He didn't seem to mind."

No. Of course not. Why would he? Darcy was beautiful and fun and she had an ample bosom. The gentlemen of the ton seemed to like that. Loki had carried on with Lady Sigyn after all, and she had was as curvaceous as Darcy.

Jane sat back, appetite lost. "Thor, do you need my help with preparing the servants for our summer home?"

Thor shook his head. "I am quite sure I can handle preparations on my own. When I leaven on the morrow, I will leave it all in your capable hands. Why do you ask?"

"I wish to take Artemis out for a ride. Do you mind?"

"Not at all. I know how eager you must have been to see her."

Jane smiled and pushed her chair back. She gave her brother a kiss on the cheek and hurried off to change into her riding dress. Fresh air, the country, her horse…maybe she could leave her feelings for Loki somewhere on the hillside.

xxxxxxxx

One of Jane's pleasures as a child was to climb trees. Her favorite was to find a low enough hanging branch that she could perch on and wile away the day reading. She hadn't brought a book with her, but that was fine. After her ride with Artemis, Jane found she just wanted to rest a bit and gather her thoughts. She half hoped Loki did not come until Mother and Thor were here for good. She needed time to gather her wits and harden her heart against him.

Especially if he and Darcy were to make that match after all…

And whose fault was that but yours? she thought. She had thought though that in that time she could make herself love Steve and her feelings for Loki would be a thing of the past. It was disconcerting that her feelings hadn't gone. They hadn't lessened. They'd only increased.

Leaning back against the trunk of the maple tree, Jane closed her eyes and forced all thought from her head. She listened to the breeze pass through the leaves of the tree, felt the wind pass over her skin like a gentle caress. She listened to Artemis munching on her carrots, and the birds as they chirped around her. Soon, she was asleep.

Jane dreamt of a wedding, but not hers. Loki and Darcy's. He gazed at her friend with so much joy on his face, and so much love, that Jane could not begrudge him the love he'd found. He deserved happiness.

With her happiness for Loki was also the crushing heartbreak that she would never love another. She would not find the same happiness for Loki was so embedded in her heart and her soul was to cut her very heart out. She began to cry in her dream.

"Jane. Jane, my love. Jane…wake up!"

Jane started awake and she gripped the branch when she felt herself begin to wobble.

"Jane!"

She looked down. Loki. Loki was there. Or was it her dream still? She blinked and rubbed her eyes.

"Jane, darling, please come down from there."

"Loki? Are you really here?" she asked.

He laughed. "Of course! Do you think me a mirage? I have traveled very far to see you and find you're not even there to hug me when I arrive. Thor is a poor substitute. I rather feel he'll crush me in those giant arms of his. Will you not come down from there and greet me properly?"

Jane smiled down at him. Even when they were children it had been Loki that had chased away the bad dreams and the monsters under her bed.

He held up his arms as if he meant to catch her and Jane laughed and climbed down. Almost as soon as her feet his the ground then she was in Loki's arms. He held her tight and pressed kisses in her hair. She burrowed into him and allowed her eyes to drift shut. "Are you here for good then?" she asked and looked up at him.

He smiled down at her and tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her ear. "I'm here for good. Do you mind?"

She shook her head. "I'm glad." And she was, even if she knew this would not help her find a way to get over him. She frowned. "Loki, what of Lady Darcy?"

He stiffened. "What of her?"

"Is there…an engagement?"

Loki shook his head. "No, sweeting. I'm sorry to report that I'll not be marrying your friend. She is a nice young woman, but she is not for me."

"But you'll not be resuming your affair with Lady Sigyn, will you?"

Loki shook his head. "No. I am blessedly unattached and plan to remain that way for a long while."

She tried not to smile at that. She tried not to be so happy. Her smile was teasing when it came. "Perhaps next Season then."

"Perhaps. Shall we return home?"

She smiled for real then and she climbed atop Artemis and him Hades, and together they returned home.

xxxxxx

The three of them had dinner together and afterwards, they sat together and just talked. It was nice, Jane thought. This was how she wished it could have been all along when they were growing up. This was how it should have been had Odin and Loki not butted heads so often. Then Loki would have never gone away and left them for so long. She would have always had her brother.

She wondered if the feelings she had now for him would have come about. Or had the time apart caused the change in her. She supposed though that it didn't matter. The fact was she had them. And they wouldn't go away.

She retired that night sleepy from the fresh air and the excitement of being home and Loki having arrived. Thor and Loki both kissed her cheeks and stayed up. Jane stretched in her bed and smiled into the darkness. She burrowed under the covers and wondered what sort of adventures her and Loki could have on the morrow.

xxxxxx

Jane woke slowly with the slow realization that a thunderstorm was going on and it was the loud crack of thunder that had awoken her. She lay there for a minute listening to the sound of rain hit her balcony and the glass doors that led out to it. She sat up and smiled when a flash of light lit up the windows, though the drapes were drawn. Then came the loud boom of thunder.

When she and Loki were kids and there was a storm one of them would seek the other out no matter what time of night it was and sneak down to the drawing room to watch the storm in front of the big windows. When they were in London, they would sneak off to the library.

With a mischievous smile, Jane flung her covers off and climbed out of her bed. She grabbed her robe and put it on without cinching it and grabbed one of her candles on her nightstand. She lit it and then carried it with her as she made her way out of her bedchamber and down to Loki's down the hall. She pushed his door open gently and slipped inside.

"Jane…Jane…" he moaned.

Jane paused in his antechamber and furrowed her brow. He couldn't have possibly heard her sneak in. And he definitely couldn't see her.

She crept closer to his bedchamber and found Loki laying back on his bed. He was as naked as the day he was born and his hand was…_oh goodness…was that a man's…? _

Darcy said men called them cocks.

Loki was stroking his _cock_.

Jane couldn't take her eyes off what he was doing. His hand gliding up and down, up and down, his back arching off the bed.

"Jane!" he cried out softly and white fluid erupted out of his cock and spilled onto his bedsheets. Jane gasped. Why had he been calling her name like that? She slapped a hand over her mouth, but too late.

Loki looked directly at her. His eyes went wide and Jane was frozen to the spot.

"Jane," he croaked.

She had to get out of there. She didn't understand what she'd just seen and heard, but she knew enough to know that she was not supposed to have seen that. She turned and ran out of his room, nearly knocking into a side table on the way out.

"Jane, wait," she heard Loki call after her.

She didn't wait. She ran down to her bedchamber and locked herself inside.

She placed a hand over her chest, her heart racing, her breath coming out in pants. She put her candle down with a shaky hand and went to the window. She opened the drapes and was about to open the window to let some air in the room that had suddenly become quite stuffy when she heard her name.

"Jane."

She cried out and spun around. Loki stood there. His hair was disheveled, he wore a pair of breeches but no shirt and he was barefoot.

"How did you get in?" she hissed. "I locked the door."

"I thought you might," he said. "I took the skeleton key."

"How do you have the skeleton key? I thought only Mrs. Reynolds had that?" Mrs. Reynolds was the head of the housekeepers.

"I took a copy."

Of course he did.

He approached her slowly, the way one might approach a wild animal. "Jane, I'm sure you are wondering what it was I was doing…"

She said nothing, just stared at him.

"Sometimes a man has to…I needed a release. I haven't been…I gave up Lady Sigyn."

"You do _that _when you're not with a woman…carnally?"

He nodded. "Have you ever—"

"_No_. Loki, for heaven's sake why would you ask me that?"

He sighed and raked a hand through his already messy hair. "Jane, I…I…"

"Why were you saying my name?" she asked.

His eyes shut and he stilled. His hands were balled into fists at his sides. The only sound in the room was a fading storm and the rain pelting the windows. Finally, he opened his eyes and looked at her steadily. He looked almost…resigned. "I said your name because I was thinking of you. I was imagining…you."


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Jane stared at Loki trying to process what he'd just told her. He looked ashamed. He hung his head and shut his eyes tightly. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"I—I don't understand," she said. "Why would you be thinking of me?"

He looked up at her in resignation. "Because I want you, Jane. Because I'm in love with you and I want you for my own. I think of you – of touching you, of holding you…"

"You do?" she whispered, scarcely able to believe it. This felt surreal. Was she dreaming? She pinched herself and then winced when it inevitably hurt.

"What are you doing?" Loki demanded. "What did you do that for?"

"I thought I must be dreaming," she murmured. "I had to check."

He swallowed hard. "I'm sorry, Jane. I know what you must think of me—"

"You don't," she said quickly. "Trust me when I tell you that you don't."

He looked at her curiously. "What do you mean, Jane?"

"I love you," she burst out. "I'm in love with you too, Loki. I have been for so long now and I didn't know how to tell you."

Loki gaped at her. "You—you love me?"

She nodded, tears of relief and joy dropping from her eyes. "I thought I was alone in it. Oh, God, Loki if you only knew how much I hated seeing you with Darcy and just the thought of you and Lady Sigyn—"

Loki cradled her face in his hand and looked down at her searchingly. "I'm not dreaming?"

"Do you want me to pinch you?" she asked with a smile.

His expression shifted to one of awe. "Jane…my Jane…"

She nodded. "And my Loki."

He bent his head and crushed his lips to hers. Jane moaned and her arms went around him. Kissing Loki was much better than kissing Steve. When she felt his tongue touch the seam of her lips, she started and gasped. And then his tongue slipped into her mouth and she and Loki shared a moan. Jane clung to him, feeling a tad overwhelmed by the onslaught of passion she felt.

Loki broke the kiss, panting, and pressed his forehead to hers. "I thought you'd marry Steve. I thought I'd spend my life having to watch you with another man."

"And I thought you'd marry Darcy or even Lady Sigyn. Thor thought you might ask Darcy to marry you," Jane whispered.

"I do not want anyone but you, Jane," Loki said solemnly and kissed her again. He began walking her backwards towards her bed. "You are all I want," he muttered against her lips in between kisses.

When the back of Jane's legs hit the bed she sat down and looked up at him. He smiled and pushed her back onto it. She scooted back onto it and Loki followed, crawling over her like a panther. Her heart hammered hard in her chest. She didn't know what he was going to do with her in the bed, but she had heard enough talk at balls to guess. As much as she loved Loki, she wasn't sure she was ready for _that_ yet. However, she was also powerless to stop him.

She matched his fervent kisses with fervent kisses of her own and when his hand parted her robe, she shivered.

"I won't make love to you tonight," he murmured. "It's too soon for that, yes?"

She nodded.

He smiled tenderly at her and nuzzled the side of her face. His nose traced a line down her cheek to her jaw and Jane moved her head to the side. Loki buried his face in her neck and sucked lightly on her neck and then kissed her there. He then rolled off of her and lay on his side, looking at her with a smile on his face. "It appears we do have some things to discuss now."

She rolled onto her side and faced him. "Yes." She scrunched up her face as though in pain. "What are we going to do, Loki? Is this not wrong? We are brother and sister."

"No, Jane, we're not. We are not blood-related."

"But Mother and Thor do not see it that way."

He sighed, reached out and caressed the side of her face with his hand. "I know."

"Are we to live in secret?" she whispered.

"No. We will tell them."

Her eyes went wide. "Oh, Loki, I don't know about that…"

"Do you prefer to live in secret then?"

She shook her head. "No, but I prefer to not be cast out of the family."

He looked puzzled by this. "Why would you be cast out?"

"Because you are Frigga's son. You are her blood. I am adopted. She might decide I am some kind of harlot, that I've corrupted you—"

Loki laughed, a low rumble. "She would not believe _you_ to have corrupted _me_, Jane. She would believe _I_ have corrupted you instead."

"Be that as it may, she could very well decide I must go." Jane shivered. "I do not wish to become a lady of the night."

"Jane, dearest, let's not get ahead of ourselves," Loki said and inched closer to her. He reached out and cupped the back of her head, bringing her in for another kiss. "I can scarcely believe this is real and not some dream," he murmured. "This feels like one of my many dreams and fantasies about you."

Jane was acutely aware that her parted robe and thin nightrail offered little barrier between her and Loki. He was barechested as it was, and she could feel his body heat through to her skin.

She could also feel the instrument against her stomach that had led to all of this. She broke the kiss, panting, and buried her face in his chest. She felt her cheeks grow hot.

"Dearest?" he asked in concern. "What's wrong, my love?"

"I can feel your…" she trailed off, mortified.

Loki laughed and brought her face up to his. He smiled. "You'll have to get used to that, darling."

"Loki!"

He laughed and pushed her onto her back. He lay half on the bed and half on her. He swept his hand through her hair and gazed down at her with a soft smile on his face. "Perhaps before we decide to tell Mother and Thor, we grow accustomed to this change to our relationship first?"

Jane nodded and smiled at him. "Yes, please."

Loki grinned and then leaned in and kissed her again.


End file.
